Ur jokes

Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.

Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.

Silence...................punch!

You smash me so hard, I gave her the D.

Figure: Who wants to play hide and seek?

Seek and Hide: Me.

Figure: Okay, hide and I will hide and Seek will be it.

Seek: Why do I have to be it?

Figure: Because your name says so.

Teacher: Stand up if you think you are stupid.

After a while, a student stands up.

Teacher: So you think you are stupid?

Student: No, I'm not stupid. I just felt bad because you were standing by yourself.

So, I was in the bathroom at school washing up, and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like, "Hey, can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like, "Sure." I was like, "Come here." So she came over to me. I was like, "Girl, look at yourself in the mirror." And she started laughing so hard, and she said, "I'm so ugly."

At school, this gurl was like, "You're ugly!" And I'm like, "Gurl, your mirror cracks the moment you step in front of it."

What sound does an Indian make when you're trying to fuck it? ieieieie.

Your hairline lookin' like it got slapped up by Will Smith.

Your hairline is built like a license plate.

When your little brother knocks your two Jenga towers you made with his toy airplane,

You: "Hey, stop trying to recreate the Twin Towers!"

Grandma: When we go to a wedding, whispers, "You're next."

At a funeral, I whisper, "You're next."

Your hairline pushed back lookin' like you got slapped up by Will Smith.

You're homeless, you orphan!

You're so emo, the sun turned black.

Shut your transparent hairline up.

Three Things I Want For Christmas From Santa:

1. A Lambo

2. A House

3. UR MOM

Ur mama so fat she needs two watches because she's in different time zones.

You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.

You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.

I went to an interview and my future boss said, "Hi, my name is Watt Niseto, meet you."

Then said, "WHAT IS UR NAME?" He then said,

"What is not my name, Watt is." So I replied, "Ugh fine, I guess I'll call you Wha." Then he said, "Wha I not my name."

And then I said, "Ugh fine, my name is Will Knott." He then replied, "Hi Will Not."

You're so ugly when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.