Two jokes
What two fights can Africa never win?
A food fight and a water fight.
You know why you remind me of a calculator? Because 1+1 equals the two of us.
The two biggest dyslexic guy lies: "My check is in your mouth," and "I won't come in your mailbox."
Two cows in a field.
One says to the other, "Mooooooo!"
The other says, "Tut, I was gonna say that!"
What do you call two skeletons dancing in a tin can?
Noise!
Memes
Two planes crashed into two separate towers.
Now two towers crash into two separate planes.
Two Timetravers walk into a bar...
...the bartender then said, "Sorry, we don't serve Timetravers here."
How do you think they found out cows produce milk?
Two kids having fun in the barn.
Why is America so bad at playing chess?
They lost two towers.
What do you call two brunettes and a blonde in the NFL?
Two tight ends and a wide receiver!
There were two friends talking one day. Tim tells John, "I think I'm gay."
John says to Tim, "What do you mean?"
Tim says, "When I grow up, I want to dress like a woman and sing karaoke in a bar and call myself (Gillette the best a man can get)!"
John says to Tim, "I think you're right, and thanks for reminding me I need to buy razors."
Dear Victims... äh Passengers, we are flying now from Ryadh to New York. Amazing Building... äh Amazing City. There's online, but 2000 there were two Towers... äh Restaurants. We hijack the plane... äh Hi Jack. Jack is my co-pilot, and I said hello. Don‘t scream... History Repea... äh... History never comes back, we are now flying back to the Airport. 💀
Which one's super super corny?
1. What's blue and not heavy? (🤔) Light blue.
2. What's blue and super hard to see?
Dark blue. (🤔)
Two (DYM 112)
Two people stood in one room. The first guy stared at the second.
First guy: “Sorry I had to punch you. It was a game, bro.”
Second guy: “Between me and you talking, there’s almost no PUNCH line. Hah!”
It must be tiring to put makeup on two faces.
I found two of the same Lego Duplo sets, so I called ‘em “Duplocates.”
These two guys were texting each other.
Guy 1: How are you?
Guy 2: I’m great. The weather is lovely here. Guy 2: *sends picture of a flying spring*
Guy 1: ???
Guy 2: Springs in the air. :)
You have two brain cells; one is lost, and the other is out looking for it.
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.