Two jokes

These two guys were texting each other.

Guy 1: How are you?

Guy 2: I’m great. The weather is lovely here. Guy 2: *sends picture of a flying spring*

Guy 1: ???

Guy 2: Springs in the air. :)

Are you the Twin Towers? Cause I'd love to take you out. 🤭

What did Osama have?

Two Boeings and a dream.

Two cyclists stop on a bridge. One cyclist says to the other, "Can you see that forest over there?"

The other says, "No, the trees are in the way."

Why did the bike fall over?

Because it was two tired.

What do you call two terrorists standing next to each other with their dicks out?

The Twin Towers.

Organise my brother's bucks party and got confused when he asked for a hot 22 year old for I brought him 20 two yr Olds....

Good thing my brother's a little bit different.

Two lepers meet on the street.

First says "How are you doing?"

Second says "Mustn't crumble!"

Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.

The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.

Q: If there were two moo cows walking down the street, where would they be going?

A: Home to see their mama!

What are two things orphans can’t have?

Parents.

I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: "This'll be interesting."

Which one's super super corny?

1. What's blue and not heavy? (🤔) Light blue.

2. What's blue and super hard to see?

Dark blue. (🤔)

Two (DYM 112)

Stephen Hawking talks by clicks. Two clicks is "hi," and five is "dab me up."

My sister lost two things today:

1: Her virginity.

2: Her job at the zoo.

Q: What do you get from a two-legged cow? A: Lean beef.

There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"

I was asked to give a bicycle joke, but I couldn't...

I was two tired.

Daveon is so straight, he thinks a straight line is the shortest distance between two points and nothing else.