Tragedy jokes
What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?
The school shooter will always spare you.
A man driving along a country road sees a little girl crying next to a cliff. He gets out and says, "Aw, what's the matter little girl?"
She points off the cliff, and at the bottom is the family car, burning with everyone inside, all mangled and dead.
The man unbuckles his pants and says, "Little girl, today just ain't your day."
I will always remember the last noise I hear in my school, "oogga booga motherf***ers," click, boom!
I would say fly high to Kobe, but obviously he didn't...
Person: So you know that person's name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dead.
Friend: Yeah, John Wilkes Booth.
Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln?
Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot!
I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters, but it just wouldn't land with people...
I know, I'm going to hell!
I've never seen my dad since September 11. I wonder where he is...
Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.
When you decide to turn your high school into your personal shooting range, but you don’t give any proper notice except for a bullet to the head...
Why are school shooting jokes so funny?
Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!
So Kobe Bryant walked into a bar, just kidding, he's dead and his fame went spiraling out of control.
Me.
The joke is me.
Joaquin Phoenix as The Joker is like Heath Ledger if he overdosed on prescription drugs... Oh, wait. He already did.
What’s the name of OceanGate’s next submarine?
Judging by the breathing conditions on their subs, I bet they’ll call it the "George Floyd."
Time to go to New York to visit the Twin Towers.
They’re already getting closer.
Kobe missed a lot of shots, but he sure didn’t miss the mountain.
Mother got shot, damn.
Father got shot, damn.
Sister got shot, damn.
Brother got shot, damn.
Auntie running away with a shotgun!
What’s the difference between a robber and an orphan?
One is wanted.
What did the captain of the Titanic do before the Titanic sunk?
He nominated everyone for the ice bucket awards.
An orphan walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Buddy, you have to go home." The orphan replies, "Where is home?"