Tragedy

Tragedy jokes

Shot

Person: So you know that person's name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dead.

Friend: Yeah, John Wilkes Booth.

Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln?

Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot!

Helicopter

I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters, but it just wouldn't land with people...

I know, I'm going to hell!

Dad

I've never seen my dad since September 11. I wonder where he is...

Bro

Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.

Shooting Range

When you decide to turn your high school into your personal shooting range, but you don’t give any proper notice except for a bullet to the head...

Shooting

Why are school shooting jokes so funny?

Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!

Death

So Kobe Bryant walked into a bar, just kidding, he's dead and his fame went spiraling out of control.

Joker

Joaquin Phoenix as The Joker is like Heath Ledger if he overdosed on prescription drugs... Oh, wait. He already did.

Submarine

What’s the name of OceanGate’s next submarine?

Judging by the breathing conditions on their subs, I bet they’ll call it the "George Floyd."

Shooting

Mother got shot, damn.

Father got shot, damn.

Sister got shot, damn.

Brother got shot, damn.

Auntie running away with a shotgun!

Titanic

What did the captain of the Titanic do before the Titanic sunk?

He nominated everyone for the ice bucket awards.

Orphan

An orphan walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Buddy, you have to go home." The orphan replies, "Where is home?"

Sally

Knock knock?

Who's there?

Not Sally, she doesn’t have any arms.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She doesn’t have any arms.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus.

Kid

Do you know who didn't graduate high school this year?

The Parkland kids.