Tragedy jokes

Stop with the 9/11 jokes.

They're not gonna fly.

Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?

Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.

Alright kids! Find a good place to stop! Then, out of the blue, Billy died. But hey, he went to a better place.

I did a knock knock joke to an orphan. I said, "Knock knock." He said, "Who is there?" And I said, "Not your parents."

What is an orphan's favorite movie? Hint, not Home Alone. It's actually Batman, 'cause they are 50% the same as him.

One thing is for sure, the victims from 9/11 died warm.

The biggest inconvenience in 2001, I thought, was my brother. Turns out it was 9/11. I guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was. Aluh aluckbar.

Titanic walks into a bar. Britannic: "What would you like to drink?" Titanic: "An iceberg."

Did you know there was a record for the quickest time to finish a story? The day it was set was 9/11. 99 stories in .4 seconds.

Who are the fastest readers in the world?

9/11 victims. They went through 67 stories in 0.67 milliseconds.

Every time I tell a 911 joke, it bombs.

Six was scared of seven because 7 8 9, so why was 10 scared? Because he was caught between 9/11.

I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.

What's the difference between twin towers and McDonald's?

One had a drive thru and the other had a fly thru.

Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?

Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.

What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?

Shooting up schoolchildren.

what song did people in Hiroshima listen to?

"Here Comes the Sun."

NWA: Straight Outta Compton.

Kobe Bryant: Straight Outta the Helicopter.

When the school shooter is gonna clap the football team but his AK jams: “Take it easy guys, I was just joking!”

I respect anyone who devotes their life to charity work.

But I think Paul Walker went a step too far.