Tragedy jokes

Who are the fastest readers of all time?

People who jumped out of the Twin Towers. Why? Because they went through 13 stories within 5 seconds.

There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?

A pentagon!

(9/11 joke)

My great grandfather died in 9/11.

He was an amazing pilot.

Two boys are talking on the bus.

Boy 1: I feel like I'm forgetting something.

Boy 2: Hey, did you hear about that school shooting last week?

Boy 1: Oh, that's right.

Alright kids! Find a good place to stop! Then, out of the blue, Billy died. But hey, he went to a better place.

Titanic walks into a bar. Britannic: "What would you like to drink?" Titanic: "An iceberg."

I was just chilling in the World Trade Center and got airplane wifi.

What is an orphan's favorite movie? Hint, not Home Alone. It's actually Batman, 'cause they are 50% the same as him.

The twin towers are just like my mom and dad, they went to work and never came back.

I did a knock knock joke to an orphan. I said, "Knock knock." He said, "Who is there?" And I said, "Not your parents."

One thing is for sure, the victims from 9/11 died warm.

The biggest inconvenience in 2001, I thought, was my brother. Turns out it was 9/11. I guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was. Aluh aluckbar.

Did you know there was a record for the quickest time to finish a story? The day it was set was 9/11. 99 stories in .4 seconds.

Every time I tell a 911 joke, it bombs.

I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.

Six was scared of seven because 7 8 9, so why was 10 scared? Because he was caught between 9/11.

What's the difference between twin towers and McDonald's?

One had a drive thru and the other had a fly thru.

Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?

Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.

What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?

Shooting up schoolchildren.

I respect anyone who devotes their life to charity work.

But I think Paul Walker went a step too far.