Worst Jokes Ever
I told an orphan his dad is Spider-Man: Far From Home.
What do cannibals eat to freshen their teeth?
Mentos.
This year I'm going to name my Christmas tree Amy Winehouse, because when it dies it will leave needles all over the living room.
My mom is bad and my dad is bad.
I'd give you a nasty look, but you've already got one.
I saw a kid in a wheelchair and I screamed, "EXTREME PARKOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Imagine if the kid in a wheelchair was in Fast and Furious. His wheelchair is the only one that keeps him going.
Your mom is so fat, she starts with the letter O in the alphabet because O.B.C.D. (Obesity).
My ex-wife misses me, but her aim is getting better.
What do you call a disabled person who deals drugs?
A wheel dealer.
Why is there no toilet paper at KFC?
Because it's finger lickin' good!
"Osama bin Laden playing MW2 Air Strike inbound."
I played Uno with my Mexican friend.
That bastard took all the green cards!
My dad died in 9/11. At least he did what he loves best: flying planes.
Two whores are watching the sun come up, splitting a bottle of Mad Dog and celebrating another night of servicing the general public. One asks the other: "Say. You ever been picked up by the fuzz?"
Her friend thinks it over, "No...but I have been swung around by the tits a few times!"
What's the most optimistic blood type? B+.
What disease causes wrinkled clothes? An iron deficiency.
Why have there been so many deaths around the world?
Trees and ropes.
A donut and depression are the same. Both have nothing in the middle, and the other is nothing is left if you leave it for too long.
What is cold and alone?
An orphan's parent.
Delyla is a bitch.
Scientists are trying to find a cure for anorexics. It should be a piece of cake!