Worst Jokes Ever
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”
George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”
Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”
I remember when Halloween was the scariest night of the year. Now, it's Election night.
A woman's age is harder to get than the President's phone number.
You must be from Pearl Harbor, 'cause baby, you're the bomb!
Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.
What’s the difference between video games and my dad?
My dad doesn’t beat me.
Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.
Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"
What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?
They usually don’t live to tell the tale.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
What’s 9 inches long and makes my girlfriend scream?
One inch and put it in her. Her miscarriage.
What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?
OJ couldn’t kill cancer.
Where do babies get baptized?
So the priest can wash their sex toys.
Imagine if a ninja got a low taper fade.
What's an emo's favorite time of year?
Fall.
My last relationship ended because I didn’t open the car door for her. Instead, I just went to the top of the water.
I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun, now it's an assault rifle.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common?
Their last big hit was the wall.
What did the autistic kid say to his girlfriend after they broke up?
"I thought what we had was special!"
All countries will get Covid.
Except China, they got it right off the bat.
What plate goes to Bikini Bottom?
Malaysia Flight 370.