Worst Jokes Ever
A young teen was walking home from school and having a nice day.
She gets home, eats, showers, and heads to her room. The young teen hears her mother say something. Not sure what she said, the girl replies with "ok."
The young teen was gonna head to bed, wondering when her mom was gonna come in and say goodnight. She lays in bed, but then she hears her mom's voice say, "Hunny, I'm home." She doesn't bother to say ok.
Later, when she decides to sleep, she gets a message from her mom saying to unlock the door, that she lost her keys. :)
What’s an emo's favorite singer?
Slash.
Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it's too cheesy.
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.
Yo mamma so fat, scientists say she's the closest planet to Earth!
Quiet kid reaches down and class starts running.
Quiet kid: What's wrong? Pulling out my...
An Eskimo was holidaying in New Zealand and while driving his rented car around the countryside it broke down. A bloke passing by offered to help, lifted the bonnet and said, "I know your problem, you blew a seal."
The Eskimo with a shocked expression retorted, "Yeah? Well you fuck sheep!"
How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
What do you call a stupid pig? A pious.
Why do emos have friends?
So they can hang with each other.
Me: I'm afraid of random letters.
Therapist: You are?
Me: [screams]
Therapist: Oh, I see.
Me: [screaming intensifies]
What does the woman say to the cannibal at the fashion show?
"Who are you wearing?"
My dad may be working, but the coping mechanisms sure aren't!
"Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate."
What did the evil chicken lay?
Deviled egg.
How does a tree access the internet?
By logging in and branching out!
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.
How's your dad?
What? I forgot he's still sleeping.
Yo mama so fat that when she went out in high heels, she came back in flip flops.
Why was the emo person dead inside?
Because I stole their insides.