Time

Time Jokes

Knock knock,

Whos there

Stop

Stop who

Stop posting stupid orphan jokes that have been posted on this site 10 times before

7

Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.

Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.

I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.

What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.

Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.

What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We Are Family.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.

What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.

What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.

Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.

What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.

Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.

What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.

Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.

Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.

I encountered a milf at a bar last night. Although she is 57 years old, she is still very charming and sexy.

We were drinking, chatting, laughing, and having a good time.

Then, she asked me flirtatiously,

"Have you ever tried a mother-daughter threesome before?"

I said, "Nope, not yet."

She drank a little more, and said, "Well, darling, tonight is your lucky night."

So she took me to her place.

She took out her keys, opens her door, turns on the light, and she yells towards upstairs,

"Mom, are you still awake?"

so once upon a time there was a man who lived in his house with his wife

he got up to go out to work and closed the front door behind him

not even 4 seconds later he came back inside panicking, saying "there's a rabbit with a gun outside!"

the wife replied "oh don't worry rabbits don't have guns they can't shoot people- you must be imagining things"

the man calmed down for a few minutes, and after some reassuring, he eventually decided to try to go back out to work again

so he stepped outside the front door and the rabbit shot him

I can't believe what just happened. I was at the bowling alley having a great time with my girlfriend 👫 when suddenly a man 🚶took all of our bowling pins! 🎳 I asked him why and he said he needed more tapins to keep his career relevant 😱. I instantly realized it was Penaldo 😡

Bee Jokes: "Hello"

"Oh hello buzzy!"

"Why are ya calling me Buzzy this whole time?"

"Because you BEE BUZZing! (Laughs)"

"It's not funny! Jokes are the worst, although I hate those Bee Jokes!"

"Chillax bro. Don't BEE a hater of jokes dude! (Laughs)"

"Aagh! You always had a choice, but I will sting ya face!"

"No! You BEE like pollen to make HONEY-moon. (Laughs)

"Stoooop!! I'm outta here, your worst fan."

"Fan?"

"Yes, your worst fan!"

"No! Fan!"

"What?! Aaaaaauuuuggghhhh!!!"

"Ohhh! Buzzy's looking BEE-wind! (Laughs)"

Snover1:You can't pass through Snow Way!

Squirtle: Why I can't pass through Snow Way?

Snover1: There's snow in the way.

Snover2:Yeah, you can't get past through the snow while it's on the way, to continous.

Squirtle: What? There's snow in here the whole time. What is this? Snow Society-?!

"AAAAARRRGGH!!"

Squirtle:Who is that?

Snover2:That is Snow.

Squirtle:What?! That is giant snow tree thing is Abomasnow!

Snover2:Oops! Don't be a Halt!

"Haaaaaaaaallllltttt!!!"

"Aaaaaauuuuggghhhh!"

Snovers: That was a JOKE, Squirtle be FROZEN, just let it go, let it go!

On the 12th day of Christmas Peo Pessi gave to me

12 tap ins 11 pointless dribbles 10 fixed league titles 9 missed penalties 8-2 6 dives 500million robbed from Barca 4 ucl semi losses 3 times he blamed higuain 2 retirements And a transfer to a farmers league

A couple were trying new things in the bedroom to spice up their marriage. The husband would blindfold the wife, put on a condom and she would guess the flavor. they did this one time a night. The first night, she put the blindfold on and he put the condom on his dick and she tasted it, she immediately knew it was strawberry. The second night, the same thing happened except it was banana. The third night, she put the blindfold on and tasted his dick and said eww it tastes like cheese and onions. The husband replied hang on I haven't put the condom on yet.

What do a blonde chick and a field of wheat have in common?

They're both bound to get plowed at some point in time.

Child:Hello I can’t find my dad.stranger:Oh well when and where did you last see him?child:Oh I remember 5 years ago he went to get some milk here.

10 years ago my dad said i should eat cereal with water until he comes back with the milk... i still eat cereal with water sadly

My little league football debut was a lot like the first time I had sex. I was beaten, bruised, and bloody, but at least my Dad came.

If you give Kobe Bryant a cigarette he will be warm for a short time, But he was set on fire in the helicopter crash so now he's warm for the rest of his life.