They jokes
Who are the fastest readers? Nine-eleven victims, because they fell through 720 stories in under 10 seconds.
Why do elephants never get rich?
Because they work for peanuts!
Who are the fastest readers? The people who were in 9/11. They went through 91 stories in 1.2 seconds.
Two Italian men get on a bus.
They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. They speak with an Italian accent.
The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
"Emma come first.
Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more.
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice.
Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"
"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to the Super Bowl game.
They had great seats right behind their team's bench.
After the game, the guy asked his girlfriend how she liked the experience.
"Oh, I really liked it!" she replied, "Especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, "What do you mean?"
She said, "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!' I’m like, hellooooo! It’s only 25 cents!"
Why can't dwarfs be depressed?
Because they are compressed.
When younger girls say, "I want my period, or it will not be bad."
*eating chocolate in bed crying* My face at them when they say that. 🤣🙄😵
Them: "I got my period." *them hurting*. Me: "Told ya."
What do you call the Illuminati when they take over the world and control everything?
The Jew World Order.
Spongebob and Jacko have one thing in common.
They both routinely place meat in small buns.
Emos are weird to me because they dress up all black, and you know I don't like that, so that's why I don't like it.
Hey amazing people! The Prankster is back! This prank was on my sister and her friends. (tbh I did not think she had friends.)
I set out some snacks for them! Btw (I can't be trusted).
I gathered some "slapies."
The things I gathered were tomatoes, onions, milk, carrots, ice cream, and some dried-out green beans! All that stuff!
I need the tomatoes to make a sauce because I am going to put that with the ice cream, mix that up with the milk, yea yea it might look like a gross and nasty dish...WRONG!!!! I am going to make it into a little snack...anyway we make that into a snack for her and her friends. The onions are used to make their eyes cry and burn but I will give them a towel after that. The dried-out green beans are just to make them go over the top and overreact because I did not cook them. After that, we make it like it's not so icky!
I feed it to them!
They overreacted!
Please leave a comment.
Bye!
Why does an orphan want to be a prostitute?
Because they want to call someone "daddy."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Cow.
Cow who?
Cow don't go who, they go moo!
Poor kids in American schools, they want books, but all they get are magazines.
What's the best part about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
What does Germany and the rest of the world have in common? They both use gases to poison one thing or another.
What do pigs and ink have in common?
They both go in a pen.
Why can orphans not play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat!
What do physically handicapped gay men do after they are done belching? They wipe their mouths on their light blue handkerchiefs after they are done sucking cocks.