They jokes
What do Nike and the KKK have in common?
They both make Black people run faster.
Why can orphans not play bingo?
Because they can't get a full house.
What does Michael Jackson and McDonald's have in common?
They both use 30-year-old meat in between two-year-old buns.
Why didn't the orphan do the work?
Because when the teacher says they would call your mum or dad, there's nobody to call.
A French, a German, and an Italian make a race to see who resists the most in a room full of flies. The French starts, and after a quarter of an hour, comes out.
Then goes the German, who comes out after an hour. Finally, the Italian enters and comes out after five hours.
The French: "But how did you do it?"
The Italian: "I killed one."
The German: "So what?"
The Italian: "And then they were all busy for the funeral!"
Why are cheetahs big cats? Because they poo and purr.
A man shoots up a school and then fakes his own death. He then later returns to shoot up the same school. He repeats the process a few times until the police catch him. When they ask why he did it, he replied, "I wondered when you would check if I was still breathing."
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
They eat the bat.
What is a similarity between a pregnant 14-year-old and the fetus inside of her?
They both are thinking, "Shit! Mom is gonna kill me!"
Q: What does a microwave and an M1 Garand have in common?
A: They both go “ping” when they’re done.
There are 5 cats on a boat, and 1 jumps off. How many are left?
Zero, they were copycats.
A rapist walks into a school and asks if they had 5 year olds in the school, and the teacher replies, "Are you that same person who took Jimmy?"
The man replies, "Yes," and the teacher says, "Take Susie too; she's being a little bitch."
Why does Michael Jackson avoid Pepsi? They gave him a hot one.
Did you know all Canadians have the same blood type?
They all have blood "eh."
Why can't blondes make ice?
They forgot the recipe.
Joe Biden walks into the White House kitchen.
"Are those brownies I smell?" he asks.
"Indeed, they are," he was told.
"Gee," he says, "they smell nothing like Girl Scouts!"
Why was the orphan so successful?
They told him, "Go big or go home," he only had one option.
The orphans all died!!!
Oh wait, no one cares...
Their parents are all dead anyway. We are just making them happier. They get to join their parents in hell.
Why do orphans not play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
What if the ocean just raided Titanic of its people? Like instead of it flooding, it was raiding it and threatened the passengers if they told, so they just said an iceberg flooded the ship.