Why don't nurses like giving old people baths or showers?
Because they don't want their vegetables to get soggy.
They Jokes
Why were the UK and the USA bad at chess?
Because they lost their queen and two towers.
Why do asscheeks make great friends?
They always stick together!
Why did the person get fired from the calendar factory?
Because they took a day off.
You know why they call me 007?
0 girls.
0 chances.
7 restraining orders.
Why are orphans not that good at baseball?
They can never hit a homerun.
Q: What do men and math tests have in common?
A: They get cheated on.
POV: A person made you mad, but you're Chinese and they have a cat. "CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, BITCH."
Yo mama so ugly that when she watches "The Outsiders," they become "The Insiders."
Why are women in love with plastic because they had a plastic "galflalflflfalfl?"
Why do apple trees like emo kids?
Because they like to play yoyo with them.
What do rednecks find when they research their family tree?
Their INCESTors!
I have a lot of money, but I don't waste it.
So people call me poor until they see my bank account.
Yo mama so old that she knew "The Outsiders" when they were "The Insiders."
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Your mom's so fat, when she entered a fat contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"
Yesterday, I was on a reality TV show where they locked me up with all those smelly monkeys from the Leger Zoo. It was complete madness.
Hey, 2001 just called.
They want their towers back.
What did the Blonde say to the other Blonde?
They don’t know; they couldn’t figure out what to say.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't get a home run.
