Who's the world's fastest reader?
9/11 victims. They went through 90 stories in 60 seconds.
They Jokes
If two people who have the clap sleep together, did they make an applause?
How do goldfish know when to eat?
They don't. They have a memory span of 3 seconds.
Why are orphans so good at tennis?
Answer: Because they never knew what love was.
When you're mad, you might as well just punch an orphan because what can they do, tell their parents?
Why did the Red Sox lose?
They say, "Boo, Colorado Rockies."
Who are the Fastest Readers in the world?
9/11 victims: They read 87 stories in 10 seconds.
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
The 9/11 victims, they went through 700 stories in 10 seconds.
Why do orphans have phones?
Because they don't know how to call home.
I don't usually like to tell 9/11 jokes for two reasons: they're morally wrong, and they tend to crash and burn.
Whenever you think back to 9/11 and realize there are 12 hours in front of us, why the f*ck didn't they warn us?
Q: Two skeletons walk into a bar. What happens?
A: They fall.
(They walked into a BAR, as in a rod or whatnot.)
Why can't orphans go to homecoming? Because they don't have a home to go to.
A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"
And the women look at him as if they have never seen a man walk into a bar before.
Did you hear about the new doggy condos?
Apparently they are now releasing!
Why can't orphans cross roads?
They don't have a parent to hold hands with.
Why can’t orphans go on field trips?
They need a parent's signature.
Why can’t orphans go to school? Because they don’t have a parent to sign them up.
What's the difference between fathers and hurricanes?
Nothing. They both destroy families and then leave for a couple of years.
