They jokes
The more they smile, the less they see.
If Hillary and Biden got locked in a room together, all they would talk about is how to ruin America and make a plan to steal children.
What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?
They usually don’t live to tell the tale.
Why are Americans so bad at chess?
They lost 2 towers.
Brian has a crush on a cute girl, Sally, from school, so he goes and tells his dad about her, and he says, "Sorry, son, you can't like her; she is your sister." So Brian is okay with it, and he starts to like another girl, Madison, and he goes up to his dad and says, "I have a crush on this girl, Madison," and again the dad goes, "Oh, sorry, son, you can't like any girl in school; they are all your sisters." So he goes crying to his mom and says, "Dad said I can't like any girl because they are all my sisters," and the mom goes, "Oh, it's okay; you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad."
You know, life as a pufferfish is tough. They get startled, then they get hard.
Once the aliens was gonna have a party, they had to planet.
How do trees calculate square roots? They use log-arithms.
Your momma is so old, when she went to the antique store, they wouldn't let her leave.
Why do my parents not love me? Because I've fucked 12 dogs and 7 minors while they were watching!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a bucket of water.
WHERE DO THEY REALLY GO BECAUSE WATER CAN NOT BE AT THE TOP OF A HILL!?. I honestly think that only people with a physics degree can make nursery rhythms.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can't find home base.
Why do orphans go to church?
Because it's the only place where they get to call him "father."
How do Asians name their babies?
They throw pots and pans around.
"Ching, Chang, Clang!"
Why can’t orphans buy ice cream?
They don’t have money.
They don't have parents because they left when you were 0.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
What do orphans and blind kids have in common: They both can't see their parents.
Hey, what are those things on your arms? They look like cuts. Wait, what? No, it's just marker. Nothing else...
Do you know pigeons die when they have sex?
I mean, the one I fucked died.