They jokes
Why are Indian people bad at Monopoly?
Because whenever they hit the corner, they build a shop.
Why do emos suck at playing tic-tac-toe on their wrists?
Because when they win, they lose.
Why are gay men better than straight women?
Because gay men are more willing to look after kids once they swallow them.
Why do orphans have only 363 days in their calendar year?
Because they don't have father's and mother's days.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Memes
How many CIA agents does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't need lightbulbs--they glow in the dark.
Crazy? I was crazy once, they put me in a room with rubber rats. Rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once...
There were four people who went to land... only three returned... Why?
They left someone for memories!
You are recently injured because of your job as a driving instructor, so you couldn't go on vacation with your friends.
Your friends tell you that they have an Asian pilot.
You realize, "They have a -1% survival rate!"
Why were there only 3,000 Mexicans at the Battle of the Alamo?
'Cause they only had 4 trucks.
Monkeys are big, but they sure can swing very lightly.
Do you know why dinosaurs can't eat hyenas?
Because they're dead! The last thing they ate was some rock.
Why can't Americans play chess? They have no towers.
Bro, is your hairline and your forehead good friends because they go way back?
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They ain't got no home to run to.
Why can’t English people play chess? They ain't got no queen.
Why does Russia suck at chess? They only have pawns.
How do 4 gay guys fit on one stool at the same time?
They flip it over.
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos. Then I made pizza because they do not live in a swing state.
What do alcoholics and gas prices have in common?
They both get really high.