They jokes
A man was almost about to drown. A boat said, "Do you need help?" And he said no.
After the boat left, another boat came to the sea, and they asked if he needed help, and he said no.
And he asked God, "Why didn't you help me?"
God said, "I sent you two big boats, you dummy!"
Did you know that new Teslas don't come with the new car smell?
They come with an Elon Musk.
What do orphans have in common with mute children?
They can't talk to their parents.
Why can’t a tree have sex? They are always tied up.
Why can’t an emo have sex?
They can’t make it to the bed, they kept swinging on the tree.
What can't play home in baseball? They don't have one.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They don't have a home plate.
A father of five puts on a gas mask and a hazard suit and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked, "Dad, what are you wearing?"
The father answered with, "A costume for Halloween."
The child asked, "Can I join?" He said no, for he said it's their last Halloween. After that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.
Why can't orphans do it?
They have no one to call "daddy."
I kept asking these kids where their parents are, and they started crying. I walked away laughing, thinking I love my job at an orphanage.
I wish I had emo nails,
So they could cut themselves.
I once saw an orphan... I decided to ask them a simple question... "Hey! Where is your family?"
They didn't reply.
I kept asking them. They started crying. I started laughing. They ran away...
Why are orphans always so successful? Because when they're told "go big or go home," they only have one option.
Why is it so difficult to watch hentai?
They moan louder than your speakers.
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a Twinkie?
Nothing. They both squirt their white stuff when you eat it.
I told my kids to smile with the monkeys in the open zoo.
They never got together at all.
Why can't a blind person eat fish?
They can't see food.
Why can't orphans have babies?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
Q: Why can't orphans be gay?
A: Because they don't have anyone they can call "Daddy."
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back.