They jokes
What does Stephen Hawking and a prostitute have in common?
They both charge.
I found a rock at the park. I threw it at some orphans.
What would they do? Go to their family?
In a thick Russian accent:
"Let's buy some vodka, pollute the earth with oil, and make insecure nuclear power plants that break all the time! Ah, yes. The mother land. A great place to be. Not like those stupid Ukrainian people who are living happy lives, they are crazy and need to die."
Why does an orphan go to a spelling bee?
So they can spell "home."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't make it to home.
I don't trust trees...they look shady.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't get a home run.
What does a man masturbating and a mayo bottle have in common?
They can both squirt out their cum.
One day a man dies and goes to heaven. He gets there and sees a bunch of clocks. He asks Jesus, "Hey, what are the clocks for?" Jesus replies, "They move every time you sin." "This is Mother Teresa's, it has not moved so she has not sinned." "This one is Abraham Lincoln's, it has moved twice so he sinned twice." The man asks, "Where is Joe Biden's?" Jesus replies, "It's in my office-- I'm using it as a ceiling fan."
Mirrors don't lie, and lucky for you, they don't laugh.
My friend said they were going to make a comeback. I told them to do it at the back of the throat.
You're so fat that when you got on the scales, they said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
Why don’t orphans play the game of hide-and-seek?
They won’t be found because no one will look for them.
What has teeth but doesn't use them to chew? The answer would be a comb or a piano, but technically, if you ripped someone's teeth out and hand them to them, they have teeth but can't chew with them.
My sister told me she liked Medusa.
I said, "Huh?"
My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.
What is the same with emos and orphans? They both are unwanted.
Why do an emo's parents not let them cook, because they are afraid they will cut themselves?
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t hit home runs.
Why is America not good at Clash Royale? Answer: They lost 2 towers! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?