They jokes

Why don't orphans learn about ancient Egypt? They don't know what mummies are.

So, there was a male whale and a female whale swimming through the ocean. One day the male whale sees a ship and says, "That's the ship that killed my parents!" So they go to the ship and blow the ship over and throw the men overboard into the sea.

The male whale sees the man who killed his parents and he was still alive, so he opened his mouth and went for the man, but out of nowhere the female whale yells, "Hey!! I was in it for the blowjob, but I'm not gonna eat seamen!"

What's the difference between McDonald's and a priest?

nothing... they both stick their meat in ten-year-old buns.

How does a disabled person play chess?

I think you forgot they don't have legs.

What's the similarity between gay men and an ambulance?

They both take it in the back and go woop woop.

I was the person that flew into the Twin Towers. I have two friends that are both twins, and whenever they speak, I tell them to shut up because if they don't, I'll make myself explode in them.

Is it necrophilia if they die while you're having sex and you just don't realize?

That's what happened to my dog.

Jesse: Do you like my ball?

Mike: Yes, they are very big. I can’t even fit them in my mouth. You bought a new ball, right?

Jesse: No, they do not leave me.

Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers?

Because they can go through 100 stories in 7 seconds.

Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers?

They can go through 100 floors in 7 seconds.