Them jokes

Orphan

When you see an orphanage bully, remind them that no matter how powerful they are, they will never be as strong as their dads... Oh wait, they don't have a dad.

Chicken

When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.

“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”

Papyrus

Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?

Sans: What do you call them?

Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!

Bitch

Ask someone to call you a bitch. When they do, tell them, "Bitches do as they are told!"

Right

What’s the difference between a woman and a policeman? One of them have rights.

Memes

Ugliness

When someone calls me ugly, I get sad and hug them.

I know life can be difficult for those with weak vision.

People

Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face.

For instance, when you push them down the stairs.

Orphanage

What is the difference between a dog pound and an orphanage?

In a dog pound, people actually want them.

Child

My wife and I have decided that we do not want children.

If anybody does, please send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

Blowjob

Why do blonde prostitutes prefer blowjobs?

They hate it when you hand it to them.

Fire

Them: What's on your arm?

Me: I'm training to breathe fire ;)

Christmas

I like Christmas.

It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁

Hell

When people tell me to "go to hell," I tell them their address.

Baby

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

Woman

What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.

Orphan

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

Make them clap until their parents come back.

Boy Scout

I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.

Emo kid

Wanna know who can jump the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.