Them jokes

I have a short TRUE story of how I found out my brother was gay and did "it" with his best friend.

When my brother was 12-13 years old, he fucked his best friend and I saw it. I was like 4-5 years old, UNDERSTANDING what "it" stood for at the time. All I heard was "ahh" and "mmm". The only thing that traumatized me the most was when my brother moaned "daddy". I was so traumatized that I told my mother about it, she rolled her eyes and said, "He's probably playing a game with Evan". BULLSHIT... NO YOU DUMBASS. He was playing the game "SEX", more like "GAY SEX".

I even told my father and he said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say". I told him DIRECTLY that I heard my brother say "daddy" to his damn best friend!

I actually got so curious, I opened the door and saw them doing "69". I was blank white after I saw it. I will NEVER forget that he did "it" with his own best friend.. NEVER forget about it.

(just a btw, I still have the image stuck in my head and never forget how YOUNG he was..)

(He ain't no virgin anymore I guess lmfao.)

(MORE STORIES COMING SOON =D)

Are butt cheeks one word, or should I spread them apart?

Christopher and Tony were tempted for a beer, but they only had 2 dollars each.

Christopher got an idea and ran away to the butcher to see if he could get something good. He came back with a sausage. So they went to a pub and ordered 2 beers and 2 whiskeys.

"Are you crazy?!" said Tony to Christopher. "We don't have any money!"

"Take it easy now," said Christopher. "I have a plan."

When they finished drinking everything up, Christopher put the sausage through his own zipper and begged Tony to bend on his knees and take the sausage with his mouth.

The bartender saw what they did and threw them out without even paying. So Christopher and Tony kept doing the same thing pub after pub after pub.

After the 10th pub, Tony said: "I can't do this anymore. I am drunk, and my knees are in too much pain to even handle the walk."

"How do you think I feel?" said Christopher, exhausted. "I dropped the sausage in the 3rd pub!"

How do you disrespect an Asian?

Give them driving lessons.

Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face.

For instance, when you push them down the stairs.

Where did Jeffrey Epstein go to college?

Bring them young.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

How are orphans like broken pencils?

Neither of them have points.

Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?

Sans: What do you call them?

Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!

Like if you listen to Kidd G.

Comment if you listen to Polo G.

Share if you listen to NBA Youngboy.

Do all if you listen to all of them and you all of them if Kobe Bryant is a legend.

When someone calls me ugly, I get sad and hug them.

I know life can be difficult for those with weak vision.

Ask someone to call you a bitch. When they do, tell them, "Bitches do as they are told!"

Why do rappers love the gym?

'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.

Why do women wear panties with flowers on them?

In loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there.

Why do blonde prostitutes prefer blowjobs?

They hate it when you hand it to them.

What is the difference between a dog pound and an orphanage?

In a dog pound, people actually want them.

How do you get a retard out of a tree?

Wave at them.

Them: What's on your arm?

Me: I'm training to breathe fire ;)

My wife and I have decided that we do not want children.

If anybody does, please send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

How do you punish a blind person?

Hand them a gun and tell them it’s a hairdryer.