Them jokes
When Little Johnny was about 3, he got curious and stuck his hand up a mannequin's pants. His mom says, "No, Little Johnny, there are teeth up there that will bite off your hand." Little Johnny thinks, "Oh no, I can't do that again."
A few years later, he was 15 and he had a girlfriend, and they were making out. She says, "Why don't you ever stick your hand up my pants?" He says, "Oh no, my mom says there are teeth that will bite off my hand up there." She says, "No, there isn't, just look!" Little Johnny looks and says, "Well, no wonder there ain't no teeth. By the way, them gums look..."
Why do orphans hate geometry? Cuz it reminds them that their parents are poley-gone.
People shouldn't worry about how orphans would feel reading these jokes. It's not like they have parents to buy them a phone or computer to see them, or even a place to charge them even if they did have one.
I've been looking for my parents for years. For the life of me, I can't remember where I buried them.
Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin off and eat them, they die.
Have a child you don't want? Just drop them off at a school they don't know and drive away.
I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!
So the teacher goes up to you and says, "I'm going to call your parents." Me: "Good luck finding them."
Why do trees never call Emos? Because they always hang up on them.
Do you know what SAWCON is?
SAWCON deez nuts.
I would roast you, but the mirrors do when you look at them.
What makes a child an orphan?
Their parents left them for good. :D
Imagine getting a call and it says, "Welcome to David's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may we help you?"
When someone got the ghost in them, sound in the Priest Busters.
When something strange and it ain't no who you gonna call? Priest Busters.
Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.
What’s the difference between a retard and a zombie? Nothing much, they both dribble, moan, are hungry, walk weirdly, and it takes a bullet in the head to put them both down.
What's the difference between China and New York City?
In China, the Asians ride ON the trains. In New York City, they usually end up riding UNDER them.
Q: How many children does it take to shingle a roof?
A: Depends on how thinly you slice them.
What's the best way to tell your friend you hate them? Option 1: Kill them. Option 2: Walk away. Option 3: Kill each other.
Me: Why can't I just kms and leave them the pain?
What's the difference between a hamster and a cigarette?
They're both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.