Theater

Theater Jokes

Teacher

Vegan Teacher the musical.

Miss Kadie - "Oh no, you poor dead animal!"

Mr. Beast- 馃幎 "You're a dumb Communist, Miss Kadie" 馃幎

Chandler-馃幍 "Yup, you're one high fluting son of a gun" 馃幍

Mr. Beast- 馃幍 "I just gobbled up a quadruple patty from my restaurant" 馃幍

Miss Kadie - 馃幍 "Don't hurt animals kids, do you want to be a vegans 'R' us kid?" 馃幍

Kids- 馃幍 "We've had enough of your problems, Miss Kadie, you're such a commie!"

Miss Kadie - 馃幍 "I just want to die because I'm so sad!"

- Miss Kadie jumps off Mr. Beast Burger and commits suicide.

Actor

Why did the actor fall through the floor?

He was just going through a stage!

Actor

Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?

Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.

Punishment

People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.

He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.

Orphan

What do orphans and olden day actors have in common?

Both get food thrown at them some of the time.

Movie

Have you heard about the new movie with Stephen Hawking as the star? It's called "Unplugged."

President

Hillary Clinton is elected president...

And on the first night she spends in the White House, she is visited by the ghost of George Washington. She asks him, "George, what can I do to best serve the United States?"

The ghost of George Washington responds, "Never tell a lie."

She says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that."

The next night, she is visited by the ghost of Thomas Jefferson. She asks him, "Thomas, what can I do to best serve the United States?"

The ghost of Thomas Jefferson responds, "Listen to the people."

She says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that."

On the third night, she is visited by the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. She asks him, "Abraham, what can I do to best serve the United States?"

The ghost of Abraham Lincoln responds, "Go see a play."

Actor

Why do they tell actors to "break a leg"?

Because every play has a cast.

Mama

Joe mama's so hairy when she went to the movie theater, the people thought she was Chewbacca!

Shrek

Shrek once went to the movies and when he sat down he felt this slimy and sticky feeling on the chair, so he stood up and complained about his chair being dirty... until he realized that he forgot to wipe earlier... so he stopped complaining and went back to his chair and sat back down.

Actor

Why do we tell actors to break a leg?

Because every show has a cast. Get it, LOL?

Orange

Knock knock.

Who鈥檚 there?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange you going to the movies tonight?

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  • King

    What's the king of all school supplies? A ruler.

    What's a flower's favorite drink at the movie theater? Root Beer.

    What's a cow's favorite place to go during his free time? The Moooovies.

    Actor

    Why do we tell actors to "break a leg"?

    Because every play has a cast! Get it? Lol.

    Life

    This is not really a joke, but it's a question.

    If life is a movie, then is death life? Is we seeing the trailer right now?

    Movie

    Hii! Oh my gosh. It has been forever! How have you guys been? Comment your favorite movie!!!! <3

    Cast

    Q: Why do we tell actors to break a leg?

    A: Because all shows and movies have a cast.