The jokes
I was reading the news and read that a kid killed his family, and when they interviewed him, he said he wanted to become Batman.
When Kobe's pilot hit the mountain, he said, "Kobe."
What is the difference between a baby and a canoe?
I would never put a canoe in my garage.
I don't get it.
Orphans are very religious, well mostly. Statistics say that roughly 2/3 of the orphan population go to church. I mean it's the only place they can call someone "father".
What's the difference between an ugly monster and you?
Nothing.
Memes
What's the difference between an orphan and a vegetable?
The vegetable gets picked.
Yo mama so fat, she uses the equator as her belt.
The reason why people are short is because their dad never came back with the milk.
What fell down the tree first, the emo or the apple?
Guess what? The apple, because the emo got left hanging.
Why do black men have nightmares?
Because the only one that had a dream got shot.
What do women and chess have in common? When you sacrifice the females and replace them, you are more likely to win.
What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Princess Diana?
Tiger Woods had a good driver.
Q. What's a bulimic's favorite movie?
A. The Purge.
Why do the twin towers and my mom have in common? They fell over.
Spell 'Imap' and say 'ness' at the end.
When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?
The average French car has 7 gears, 6 of which are in reverse mode just in case the Germans come back.
What's the fastest thing on earth?
An Ethiopian with a McDonald's Voucher.
Just give him a smooch it’s better than the cooch - Dream
What’s the best part about fucking an emo chick?... she's limited edition.