The jokes
Yo mama is so short, Minions look down at her.
Yo mama is so fat that she volunteered for the Hunger Games 'cause she thought it was an eating competition.
Yo mama is so ugly when Santa Claus saw her, he yelled "Ho Ho Holy Sh*t!"
Yo mama is so old, when she walked into an antique store, they didn't let her leave.
Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.
There are two doors leading to Heaven: one for henpecked husbands and one for unhenpecked husbands. The line to the door leading to Heaven for henpecked husbands was five abreast and five miles long. The line leading to the door to Heaven for unhenpecked husbands consisted of only one lonely man.
The guys from the henpecked husband line looked at the one man in the unhenpecked husband line and shout, “Hey, Charlie, why are you standing over there for?” Charlie glances over his shoulder and observes a sea of humanity of henpecked husbands as far as the eye can see and says grudgingly, “I don’t know. My wife told me to stand here.”
Someone asked me where to find de wae?
I replied with: Oh, de wea, that's a shop. It's down the road.
@everyone.. what's so funny is that JIT thinks he's so "cool" and that everyone is "amazed" about him hating on people who is wayyy above him on the roster.
The pathetic part is that he hates on everyone else's family and relationships when 100% of us have a WAYY better one than he will ever deserve. He was born pathetic, and will die pathetic. So JIT, please tell me what it's like to be such a coward?
Perfect dinner joke.
Did you hear about the new movie, "Constipated?"
It hasn’t come out yet.
Memes
Stop the orphan jokes!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
People have been killed.
People have been killed who?
The 9/11 victims.
If your dad said, "Take out the trash," he means to take you out.
Everyone give this joke a thumb's down and see if it can become the worst rated joke on the site.
Why do kids want to become cops? They want to find the guy who touched them.
I like the satisfying sounds of your butt being spanked.
Why can’t orphans tell jokes?
Because their parents can’t *bear* the *jeans* because they don’t have any.
Why didn't the wife want sex?
Because they were having too many babies.
Trump can get banned. The cops can tack him to jail, and Trump go go go go bye bye for good. Trump is meing.
Have you seen the inside of Helen Keller's houses? She hasn't.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
What is black and white and red all over? A newspaper.
"Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a computer screen, and then they can see the government has to get Chili's."
The best part of you ran down your mother's leg... Einstein got ready to climax while doing math but realized you can't cumtilyain cumtilion. It's after sucktillion fucktillion.
Why didn’t the orphan celebrate their birthday?
Because they didn’t have a mom to birth them.
What did the SS say when A.H. was running out of ideas?
"You Wannsee my 'final solution'?"