The jokes
Once there were three Indians. Two were smart and one was... not so smart.
One day, the first smart Indian went out hunting. He came back with a dead deer. The not so smart Indian asks "How'd you do it?"
The smart one replies, "I followed the deer tracks, shot the deer, and brought it home."
The next day, the next smart Indian goes out. He comes back with a dead bear. The not so smart Indian asks once again "How'd you do it?"
The smart one replies, "I followed the bear tracks, shot the bear, and brought it home."
Finally, it's now the not so smart Indian's turn to go hunt. Multiple hours had passed since he left. The smart Indians go out to search for him. They finally find him, bloodied and on the verge of dying. The smart Indians exclaimed "WHAT HAPPENED!"
The not so smart Indian replies,
"Well I... I followed the train tracks, an... and shot th- the train... bu- but it kept going..."
Little Brown Bear (LBB): Why did Santa take the kitty and all of my toys, Mummy?
His mom: Maybe because you're the second most massive shit stain besides Caillou.
*Krampus comes down the chimney to eat LBB*
Krampus: Should’ve been better, Little Bear.
LBB: Help, Mummy! He’s the Scratchy monster!
Shrek: Just kidding, it’s not Krampus, but indeed me and Black Donkey instead, and we’re going to poop on your floor.
Duggie: Hopefully Marvin doesn’t see us, and by the way, want some purplish Kool-Aid?
What did the blind, deaf, and dumb orphans get for Christmas?...
Cancer.
Bully: Gina, why are you such a whore?
Gina: Because they hit me on the butt!
Bully: Yes, that must be cute!
Gina: Hmmm...
Gina: Do you want???
Bully: 😍😍😍... sexy ass!
Bully 🖐🏻🍑
Gina😊
What do you call that big, useless piece of skin attached to the outside of a vagina?
A woman.
Memes
Lil Johnny came home one day and said, "What do fucking each other mean?"
Then he walked through the living room and his dad was fucking his mom, so oh.
Why don't you see any more fat Chinese men?
Because the last Chinese man was in WW2.
Want another joke? Look in the mirror.
A married couple are on holiday in Italia. They look at the Leaning Tower of Pisa. He says: - Look, honey, this tower is crookedly standing! She: - Shut up!
(Standing means: penis erection)
Rock-a-bye dummy, in the tree top.
When the wind blows, the cradle will rock.
When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall.
Down will come dummy, cradle and all.
Why is the orphan so dumb?
Because he didn’t have parents to pay for it.
The cat said hi.
Where do whales get weighed?
The whaleway station.
Bants ahahahahahahahahahahhahahahashahahhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
What are the kids addicted to these days? Juulius Caesar (Juuls).
What do you call a dead human?
A DEAD HUMAN! HAHAHahahah ha.. ha.. ha Am I the only one laughing?
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Someone unplugged the router.
What do you do if your dishwasher stops working?
Punch her in the face and remind her of her duties.
What is the difference between the snow ❄️ and sun 🌞? Snow is slippery, and the other kind 🧒 of weather is not slippery.
Maishah, the poo comes from an old bathroom in a country starting with B.
Do people live on the Earth 🌏? Yes, a lot of people live on the Earth 🌎.