The jokes

What is the difference between a refrigerator and a baby?

The refrigerator doesn't cry when I put my meat in it.

Who is Stephen Hawking's wife?

The American Siri.

What’s the hardest part of the vegetable to eat?

The wheelchair.

Why did the girl not eat her dinner?

because she has an eating disorder.

Why does former president Donald J. Trump still want the Mexican government to help him to build a wall to keep them out because he is a Christian nationalist on steroids?

Your mum sunk in the pool because she had a big butt.

Guy: Are you depression? 'Cause you're crippling me.

Car driver: No, I'm the guy that hit you with his car and crippled you.

Guy: Don't worry, I was already crippled because I got crippling depression.

"Today was the worst day ever." "Why?" Because my ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.

I have a big bag of Doritos in the kitchen. It's only for people who are skinny, but the fat people can't have any. All they do is suck it up like a lollipop.

What is the difference between a human and a magic house!?

A magic house 🏡 can fly, and a human can walk.

What happens when you cross a cow and a redneck?

The redneck fucks the cow.

Ahh, the coronavirus!

This is a Rickroll. The joke is that you thought you were going to get something else, but instead you got Rickrolled.

A 6-year-old told the class the first time she got AIDS. The teacher listened. She said she scraped her knee. The girl was sent to an asylum. When she got out, she was 20. She had AIDS.

Why were the tenants of the Twin Towers sad?

They ordered a pepperoni pizza, but they got PLANE.

I

FCC’s

Rhgstvyvybuiucrxbukuvtxw is a really nice day to come over and Thursday morning at the skatepark. I hygybhbubugydedhepbzehnsiejrfuidjojdueu is a bdebdurbxornixrnidnrjbdirudjbdjebhsbeha hle se hav rhz rhombus rhxhbeihs Heudjebxrbxh rbxh.

Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her... she had really bad balance.

Her last name starts with "A" and ends with "D," and the middle letters are "P-O-O."

I'll pat your breasts, pat your breasts, cos I'm a baker's man, and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I'll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", And then throw you in the fire cos you're now worthless to me!

From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.

My name shows it all if you can't see, IDC AT ALL, you can ban me.

But let me tell you one thing, Without God, Isr-el is nothing.

So let me say it again, one last time, Free Free Palestine!