The jokes
If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!
The amputee: -_-
What's the best part of a terrorist on Fourth of July?
The finale.
Your hairline's so bad, your dad went to get the milk and never came back. Years later, he comes back and says, "Go get a hairline, boy."
Why don't we keep the balls rolling?
Jonny went to Disney and they had sour balls. He asked the cashier for some and he pulled down his pants.
Memes
when she says its her first time by u feel the presence of the past dihs inside her
What did the people in 9/11 say when they got the wrong pizza? Man, they got it wrong, I wanted this shitty plane!
A man is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door.
He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.
He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there's a knock at the door.
He opens it and sees the same snail.
The snail says, "What was that all about?"
One day I went to talk to my friend.
"Hi John!" I said.
No response.
"Oh, yeah."
I went to pick up the remote and clicked the unmute button.
"Hope that helps!"
Why did AlexDaEgg fall down the stairs? Because he is fat.
Mum: Why are you throwing a paper plane at the twins?
Me: 😈
The joke I'm telling is my brother, Joey.
11/9 is opposite day. The towers fall on the planes instead of 9/11, way.
Stan says shut the f**k up or sit your ass down on that b***h chair!
The man says, "Can you hump me?" So the other boy says, "Bro bro bro bro bro."
When do you know your dad knows you are sneaking out? He hears the loud creaks.
What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?
Cotton gets picked.
Why is the blind man so close to the door?
He can't see it.
I went to the orphanage and shot everyone in there. It's not like anyone will attend their funeral.
Yo mama so fat, every time she measures her carbon footprint the website breaks.
Why did the Twin Towers fall?
They collapsed because of the heat.