The jokes
A woman was in the Twin Towers. She orders a pepperoni pizza but got a plane pizza.
A kid came to the orphanage with a dead fish. She was crying.
Why was the kid crying in the orphanage? Because someone came for the fish.
Joe Mama so fat, when she told a joke nobody laughed, but the floor was cracking up.
Why can't the orphan play baseball? Because they can't find home.
I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.
Twitter just blew my mind.
I was having a blast until I ended the stream with a bang!
What’s the difference between Apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
Daughter: Hey Dad, can I use your car?
Dad: Sure, but first you have to give me a blow job."
Daughter: Okay, (proceeds to service dad). Dad, ewww, your dick tastes like shite!"
Dad: Oh, that's right, I lent your brother the car.
What's the opposite of Jason?
Jasister.
Yo momma so fat, when she said, "Order in the court," she really meant burgers and fries.
What is an orphan's first step to the orphanage?
My mom went to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth.
Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson & Neil Armstrong? A: Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson f@ck$ little kids in the a$$!
Whenever someone calls me ugly, I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.
Yo momma so stupid, when someone got cardiac arrest, she tried to put the person to court, and when the judge said "ORDER AT THE COURT," she thought it's a food court and ordered 20 Big Macs and got a heart attack.
What's the difference between a pregnant girl and a light bulb?
... You can unscrew a light bulb, but you can't unscrew a pregnant girl.
What's the difference between a criminal and an orphan?
One is wanted and one's not.
Sally had 9 pounds of boobs (9), which was 2 2 many (922), so on the 9th of the month (9229) at 6pm (92296) on 68 street (922968), she went to doctor x to get 6 operations (922968x6) and left her (flip your calculator) boobless.
When I wear all black, I'm not emo. I'm a rainbow, 'cause I'm wearing all the colors. #Science