The jokes

Poop

Why did the poop cross the street? Because it was trying to get in the toilet.

Snack

J0K35 (me): So I heard China recently released a snack.

Guy: Oh, what is it?

J0K35: They call it the Asian Raisin.

Guy: Isn't that what RiceGum was when he released Frick da police?

Squirrel

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter, so now I am dead!" Haha, it is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Memes

Kid

That moment when the disabled kid has to take the Pacer test.

Chicken

Why is the chicken that crossed the road a cannibal? Because he went to KFC.

Love

What is the definition of Endless Love?

Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder playing tennis!

Blonde

A redhead, a dark-haired woman, and a blonde walk into a bar and agree to fly to the sun!

The blonde states, "I agree, let's leave at night!"

Cannibal

Tumblr people: "There are an infinite amount of genders."

The cannibal kid: "Bitch, please. There's just one gender: Food."

Tuna

What is the difference between a guitar and a fish?

You can't tuna fish.

Homework

The teacher says to do your homework. I do. My friends do. One person never does any of his homework.

Eventually, we had to have fun. He said he didn't do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly committed suicide.

Princess Diana

Why did Princess Diana cross the road?

She wasn’t wearing her seatbelt.

Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head and shoulders all over the windshield.

Cow

What did the cow say to the cheese? I am your father.

What do you call a cow that's laying down? Ground Beef.

Suzy

Why did Suzy fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Suzy.