The jokes

Grandpa

My grandpa's last words before he died in Vietnam were, "What the fuck did I step on?"

Duck

Why was the duck fired from the train station?

He was a bad conducktor!

Orphan

Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.

Outlaw

What's the difference between outlaws and in-laws?

Outlaws are wanted :)

Game Night

Did you know that if you die you can still be a part of family game night!

All you have to do is have your family cremate you and put you in an hour glass, and the games that use hour glasses, well, you will be a part of family game night.

Dream

Have you ever heard of a dream that that that that the universe was a fake machine?

Earth

How does the earth rate its sex?

Earthquake, Cataclysm, Volcano explosion, Earth's core explodes.

If the earth's core explodes, then he got tore up!

Zoo

I told my kids to smile with the monkeys in the open zoo.

They never got together at all.

Prince Andrew

When you turn 100, you get a letter from the Queen. When you turn 16, you get a DM from Prince Andrew.

CPR

I was drinking a martini when a waitress yelled, "Do you know CPR?"

I replied, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed, well, except one person.

Orphan

The difference between an apple and an orphan is that the apple gets picked.

Penaldo

You caught a Penaldo!

Description: Penaldo, the finished statpadder. It is said that Penaldo drains the energy of its teammates and sells underwears.

Type: Ghost type.

Moves: Dive

Disappear in big games

Cry for pens

Statpad vs farmers

Sells underwear

West

These are the reasons the West will fall. Also, men's rights are f***ing stupid if men keep voting for rich whites!

Emo

Why did the emo swallow the alarm clock?

So he could wake up inside.