The jokes
Yo hairline so bent even Bob the Builder can’t fix it!
Why can't orphans use iPhones?
They can't find the home button.
Yo mamma so fat, when she tried to sit down the chair ran away.
What's the difference between a mother and a father? The mother always comes back from the shop.
You live in the airport.
Your mum so fat, she broke the stairs down to the fridge.
The reason they attacked the towers is because the terrorists thought the towers were giant middle fingers pointed at them. What silly saudis!
When was the last time you saw yourself in the mirror?
Your hairline so far back, it's a wide receiver for the Minnesota Vikings.
The only doctor you have is Doctor Pepper.
What's the difference between 5% of priests and 5% of atheists?
5% of atheists have seen a ghost.
5% of priests have spooked altar boys in the sacristy.
Remember the name Ben Andrews.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
Your teeth are so yellow, when you smile, you put the sun out of business.
I was playing hide and seek at work the other day. Unfortunately, it ended with me in the hospital, though; ICU.
What did the farmer say to the doll?
You death baby doll.
Are you the Twin Towers? 'Cause you sure upgraded.
"A foolish man is lactose intolerant. A wise man simply tolerates it."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
What do the Twin Towers and your siblings have in common?
Once they turn 18, they never come back.
Why did Jesus die at the diving Olympics? Because he can't go through water.