The jokes
Yo mama so fat, when she goes to the movies, she sneaks candy in her fat rolls.
What's worse than a bag of dead babies? One at the bottom is still wriggling.
Yo mama so fat, she sunk the Titanic.
I wonder if the 2 Irish kids off the Titanic movie who went to sleep before it sank had wet dreams?
What did the blind deaf orphan child get for Christmas?
cancer.
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your cock into a girl's mouth.
If there was a quiz on midgets, here’s the Midget quiz and the questions that would be on it:
1. When midgets get high on any drug, do they get high or medium?
2. Do midgets come out the closet or the cabinet?
3. Are Midgets related to Snow White’s 7 Dwarfs?
4. Is a midget just a human without the mushroom in Mario?
5. Was this funny?
Why did Sally fall off the swings?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
Guy 1: Why is my cat so angry?
Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage.
Guy 1: Don't you?
Guy 2: Yeah, it seems delicious.
Guy 1: Mmm, so... w-wait what are you doing? I didn't think you meant the one in my lunch :< Where are you leaving #_#
**Meow...**
Guy 1: Shut up, I will never feed you this sausage. It's not for you :< -_- </3
Q: Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
A: It did not want to get stuck in a crack.
When I die, I'll let everyone I kept dear lower my coffin into the ground.
So they can let me down one last time.
When life gives you lemons... call them yellow oranges and sell 'em for double the price!
Why does the orphan have water with its cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk.
Man: Aw man, I'm having a bad day.
Man's friend: Same.
Man: So why did you have a bad day? My brother got hit by the school bus.
Man's friend: I got fired as a bus driver.
Man: Oh great heavens!
My friend looks more red than Mr. Krabs.
It’s weird, I could’ve sworn I saw the silhouette of a belt hurling towards him the other day.
Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police... Who? It's the police, let me in so I can get some donuts!
What do CG artists and porn stars have in common?
They both composite (cum pose it) at the end.
The only letters in the alphabet that you know are "KFC."
What's the difference between a puppy and an orphan?
Puppies get adopted.
If you mixed the Iraq wheat scandal with the basics card paying other people's dole to your wife and tumble dried it in a royal commission that made your priestly mates look bad, what would you get?
Tony Abbott's career.