Tell Jokes

Three blonde sisters die and are told by an angel that in order for them to go to heaven they have to pass all 100 steps. But each step has a joke, each joke gets funnier and funnier. And in order to pass them all, you can't laugh at any joke or else you go to hell. The blonde girls accept the offer.

So the angel begins telling them the jokes. One of the girls laughs at the 3rd step. The second blonde laughs halfway there. Finally, the last blonde was at the 100th step. The angel said, "This is the last step. If you laugh you will go straight to hell with your sisters and if you don't you can pass." The blonde agrees and the angel starts to tell the joke, "What do you ca..." Out of nowhere the blonde starts bursting out laughing. "Why are you laughing? I haven't even finished the joke yet!" The blonde replies, "I just got the first joke!"

Hey can i tell you a joke about pencils never mind its pointless.

Patient: “Doctor my bottom hurts” Doctor: “Can you tell me exactly where it hurts?” Patient: “Right around the entrance” Doctor: “As long as you call it the entrance it will hurt”

we are all just suicidal kids telling other kids not to do it.

Someone stole my grass today, I went to the police and they said: "What's wrong?" I said "How could you tell something was wrong?" they replied "you were looking forlorn"

roses are red,vilots are blue,i tell you you look pretty,but all you do is look like a poo

Two to the one from the one to the three I like good pussy and i like good trees Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe And i get more ass than a toilet seat Three to the one from the one to the three I met a bad bitch last night in the d Let me tell you how i made her leave with me Conversation and hennessey I've been to the motherfuckin' mountain top Heard motherfuckers talk, seen and dropped If i ain't got a weapon i'ma pick up a rock And when i bust yo ass i'ma continue to rock Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet It's real easy just follow the beat Don't let that fine girl pass you by Look real close 'cause strobe lights blind

Coronavirus walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "Gimme a shot of whiskey, will ya?"

The bartender says, "Sorry. We don't serve viruses here."

Corona replies, "Well, you're not a very good host."

Knock knock

whos there?

Police

Police who?

Police stop telling these awful knock knock jokes

I would tell jokes about Kobe, but they would just crash and burn.

Doctor: You need new glasses.

Patient: How'd you know? I haven't even told you what is wrong with me yet.

Doctor: I could tell as soon as you walked in through the window.

if ur frundy on a game sud i will kill u in the game u sud saw will if u did kill me i will tell the my more frundy to ban u from the game the frundy sud what u got frundy on the game iack u r not my frundy the all frundy u be ban if u dont get it will af fun if u dont like the text am come for u ok k now like it the end

Son:mom can i tell you something?

Mom:yes of course honey whats up?

Son:ok U HAVE TERRIBLE JOKES THERE NOT EVEN FUNNY

MOm:well i made you

if ur sis mack u mad saw go to ur frundy home play if ur sis sud no go tell mom

Did you just farting a minute ago in the dumpster? I can tell you probably have a mud burrito for breakfast.

Q:how can you tell if a vampire is sick

A:By how much hes coffin

I'd tell you a joke about my boyfriends dick, but It's a private joke.

Your mom wants to tell you that your adopted but you were an orphan.

When someone tells me to kill myself

Panic! At The Disco: Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time

Once I tried to tell my friend a joke about dead people... but it went six feet underground...