Tall jokes

What will you call Burj Khalifa after 100 years?

"Bujurg" Khalifa. (Just a joke)

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation."

Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.

The frog says $30,000.

The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.

Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what the heck is this?"

The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

Did you hear about the four foot tall psychic who escaped prison?

He's a small medium at large.

Q: How tall was Hitler's grass? A: *Hitler salute* about this high!

Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn’t find a cow tall enough to have a shower.

What do you call a tall terrorist?

Osama Bin Laden.

Your mummy is so tall, she uses the Eiffel Tower as a dildo.

What do you call a tall, affluent person? A big success.

How did the Scottish man find the sheep in the tall grass?

Satisfying.

God: (creating elephants) Make it big.

Angel: How big?

God: As big as my d--

Angel: Whoa!

God: Fine, 10 feet tall.

Angel: That's big bu--

God: Put a long thing on its face.

What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?

A: Garry Glitter's boots.

Milk makes you tall, right?

Well how did you get tall if your dad didn't come back with the milk?

I went to a tall girl and I asked her, "What do you do for a living?" She says, "An account." So I reply with, "An accounting the hairs on people's heads," and then I run away.

I've been drinking from a tall cup.

His teeth look like Twin Towers, Al-Qaeda blown him up.

You're so short, Aiden looked tall.

What is tall when it's young but short when it's old?

A candle or a pencil!

I was digging and found some gold. I was going to tell my mom, then I remembered why I was digging.

I saw two really tall guys. I walked up and said, "I didn't know we still have the Twin Towers!"

Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.

Why do giraffes have such long necks?

Because their feet smell!