Tableware jokes
What did the plate say to the other plate? Lunch is on me! 馃槀
What do you call a plate that lies? Dish-onest!
Anyone here a spoon?
Your mom: Your plate is full, that's enough food on your plate.
Me: My plate is not full, I still see the white of the plate.
What did one plate say to the other plate?
"Dinner's on me."
dinner time
Yo mama so stupid, she used a fork to save the milk from the cereal.
What did the fork say to the cake when he said, "I hope you get eaten?"
Fork off!
What did the plate say to the other plate?
You look like a cow went through puberty, put the milk before the cereal, then ate it with a fork with a little sprinkle of steak.
What do you call a mug? A mug dummy.
What did the fork say to the spoon?
Nothing, forks don鈥檛 speak, silly!
What do you eat out of?
- A bowl.
Bleach solves so many problems: stains, dirty dishes, messes, and overpopulation.
So, I went out to eat the other day, and the waitress came up to me and asked if I wanted a glass of water. I said, "Yes ma'am." She said, "Oh honey, you don't have to call me ma'am, I'm not that old." I said, "Okay, thanks bitch."
What do Polish people in Poland use chop sticks for?
tweezers.
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? You slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.
My kids are so ungrateful. I got them a new dishwasher and they just won't stop complaining about their mom.
Community talk
I'm a little teapot short and stout. Here is my handle here is my spout. When I get all steamed up then I shout! Tip me over, pour me out.