Suicide jokes
Why do deer stay in front of a moving car?
To commit suicide.
What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang on trees.
What can't you say to an emo?
Hang in there, buddy!
Why did Adam commit suicide? Andy went through the back door.
What has more brains than Kurt Cobain?
The wall behind him.
Person: Where do I commit suicide?
Dog: Roof.
Person: Good idea.
The gas prices are going up so much that even Hitler is killing himself.
"Suicide bomber kills 44 people in Pakistan mosque." Damn, that's a crazy K/D. He must be hacking.
Me lol.
What did the rope say to me?
"Hey there man, you wanna hang later?"
What fell down the tree first, the emo or the apple?
Guess what? The apple, because the emo got left hanging.
Vegan Teacher the musical.
Miss Kadie - "Oh no, you poor dead animal!"
Mr. Beast- 🎶 "You're a dumb Communist, Miss Kadie" 🎶
Chandler-🎵 "Yup, you're one high fluting son of a gun" 🎵
Mr. Beast- 🎵 "I just gobbled up a quadruple patty from my restaurant" 🎵
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "Don't hurt animals kids, do you want to be a vegans 'R' us kid?" 🎵
Kids- 🎵 "We've had enough of your problems, Miss Kadie, you're such a commie!"
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "I just want to die because I'm so sad!"
- Miss Kadie jumps off Mr. Beast Burger and commits suicide.
Why did the man become stupid?
Cause he was suicidal, herbivorous. Ja...
My ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's going to be hanging tonight.
When the teacher calls on you and asks you how many people did Hitler kill?
"One, he killed himself."
So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree.
Too bad he left him hanging.
A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree. Which one is gonna land first?
The leaf, because the rope stops the emo kid.
How sad and pathetic is it that all you wait for after you finish a suicidal joke is for people to like your joke, but you know you'll just be a failure at that as well?
What's the difference between an emo kid and an apple?
One hits the ground when they fall from the tree.
You wanna know what I have in common with an apple?
We BOTH look good hanging in a tree.