Suicide jokes
What happened when the depressed kid went to give it a high five?
It left him hanging.
What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.
Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.
This guy came into my library a year ago and borrowed a book named "How to Commit Suicide." He never returned it.
A depressed man has been thinking of killing himself, and his friend says, "Find Jesus instead, he'll help you!"
And then the man says, "It's pretty hard to 'get help' from something that doesn't exist."
Are you a gun because I want to live with you?
I wanted to fall off a cliff, sadly, there aren't any cliffs near my house.
Why do trees never call emo kids? Because they always hang up on them.
Why did Hitler kill himself?
Why did the orphan kill itself?
Because he's depressed about no family.
Why did the emo kid hate the tree?
It left him hanging.
Why did the orphan die?
He killed himself because the lack of a support system made him depressed.
I wish I was at a Western bar; then I would get shot.
Me lol.
A man went into a library to get a book on how to commit suicide.
The librarian said, "No, you won't bring it back."
When there are more suicidal people, it means there are fewer suicidal people. That means there is an infinite generator of them.
Why is the record for longest jump kept by an emo?
They're still hanging.
Hitler is a national hero, he killed Hitler... Oh wait.
Yo mama so fat that when she attempted suicide, she bounced to Area 51.
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
Me: Hey! Do you know how to tie a knot?
Person: Yea, why?
Me: Cause I need help tying this noose :)