Stand jokes
A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands money.
Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "Yes sir, I did."
The robber shot him in the head, killing him instantly.
He then turned to a couple standing next to him and asked the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "No sir, I didn't, but my wife did!"
What does FNAF stand for? Five Nasty Ass Fools.
Why do G-Unit and C-Unit stand for? Gorilla unit and chimpanzee unit.
You’re so short, you could sweep under your bed while standing.
Why do people in a wheelchair make bad jokes? Because they are bad at stand-up.
If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
What does NASA stand for?
Need a star A.S.A.P.!
Why was Stephen Hawking a bad influence towards kids? Because he couldn’t stand for anything.
What do the initials NOW stand for?
(A.) National Organization For Women
(B.) National Organization of Whores
(C.) All the above
Answer:
Since the initials NOW can stand for anything, the correct answer is all the above.
I sit because I can't stand you.
What does "Keo" stand for?
Kick Elmo more.
Must. Escape. Meme.
Existence is what meme stands for for some haters.
Why was the short person a coward? They didn't stand up to challenges.
So I went to a mall and I was finna buy something... and I saw a little boy and he said "hello," so then I passed by him and he said "hi," and I was like "hi nigga," and he said, "um, just wondering something... I mean I like jokes, but what is dark humor?" And I was like "umm🤔.. it's like 🤔🤔...like you see that guy without legs? Tell him to stand up"... and he said "I'm blind nigga" and I said "exactly homie"... aight nigga peace and look out😏😉
Yo mama so fat, she stand on the scale and the scale says: "I want your weight, not your phone number!"
What did the Army soldier say after he got his legs fixed?
Afgan-I-Stand.
What does BLM stand for?
Bisexual Lives Matter.
The duck walked up to the lemonade stand.
And he said to the man Running the stand, "Hey! Bomp bomp bomp Got any grapes?"
All these jokes are so offensive, Mr. Hawking just won’t stand for it.