Sports jokes
Why can't Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat.
What's a lesbian's favorite sport? Dodgeball.
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can never hit a homerun.
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
'What does it look like?' she finally asked. The policewoman replied, 'It's square and it has you picture on it.'
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. 'Here it is,' she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "OK, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop..."
What do you call Mordecai dressing up as a basketball player?
Blue Jay Simpson!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home to run to, lmao.
What do I call a white person with 15 black kids?
Coach.
Bob and Brad loved baseball. When Brad was dying, Bob asked Brad to see if there was baseball in heaven. Brad died, and two weeks later, Bob woke up to Brad's voice. Brad said, "I've got good news. They do have baseball in heaven. Bad news is that you're up to bat next."
P = Person (not original "pun")
P1: Hey girl! P2: I got a bf! P1: Well, I got a Lamborghini Aventador, a Bugatti Super Sports, a yacht, and a private plane. P2: BF stand for breakfast. P2: Oh, and also, where did you get all that stuff? P1: GTA5 P2: You motherfucker!!!
(Communications with this person are now blocked)
Rangers are a joke.
Why did the basketball player not get on the bus?
Because he couldn’t be caught travelling! 😂
My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."
"Most Deadly Sport"
Playing chicken with a train!
Why don't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
I used to be a banker but I lost interest.
Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She always ran away from the ball.
Why can’t bikes stand? Because they are two tired (Too tired).
What do you call a country who needs another race just to be the best country in sports?
America.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.