Sports jokes

Cristiano Clapnaldo woke up FEELING DANGEROUS against Real Sociedad!

- 0 tapins! - 0 assists! - 3/3 dives! - 0 key passes! - 2 big chances missed! - 1/4 dribbles! - 2 Offsides! - 27 claps!

Better than Elanga?

He turns, he shoots!

And that is a horrible end to the Grand National...

Kobe never missed a shot, but he missed the helipad.

I'm going to hell!

Yo mama so dumb, she thought a quarterback was a refund.

What are Russia's favorite netball positions?

Goal Shooter and Wing Attack.

Why are the Chinese bad at baseball? Because they already ate the bat!

I was playing FIFA and out of nowhere the game glitched during a penalty shootout.

Pionel Pessi appeared out of nowhere, took my pen and skied it. Thanks to him, I'm out of UCL and was sacked in Career Mode. Shame on you Pessi!😡😡😡😡

Why can't orphans never run all the bases in baseball? Because they can never make it home.

What are orphans' favorite sports team? The home team.

Why is the thief so good at basketball? Because he can shoot, steal, and run.

Why shouldn't you let a Chinese person play baseball?

'Cause they'll eat the bat!

Emo kids are so good at kicking football. I hear they have good hang time.

How do you make a fruit punch?

You give it a pair of boxing gloves.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they don't know how to hit a home run.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan.

What's Kobe's favorite song? "It's Going Down" for real.

What's Al-Qaeda's favorite sports team?

The New York Jets.

What is Al-Qaeda's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

What's the difference between a silver medal and a priest?

They both came in a little behind.

Question: What does tennis have that orphans don't get?

Answer: Love.