Sports jokes
Why didn't the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn't in it!
I wanted to play as Kobe in my console, but the game crashed.
As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.
I love to play catch with my dad! He's never there to catch the ball, though.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.
my cats dunking on Micheal Jordan
Balls are annoying. They just bounce and never keep still.
What's the difference between a sports car and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a sports car in my garage.
A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark.
So in a triathlon, it would all come down to whoever can ride a bike the fastest.
Why doesn't the Chinese have a cricket team?
It's cuz they always eat the bat.
What is a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross-country!!!
Why can't orphans play basketball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.
1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.
2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
So the coach got mad at me because I'm the only one on my team who is only a bit on the spectrum, and I was just keeping the ball to myself. The coach pulled me aside and said, "Pass to others." I said, "Why?" And he said, "There's no 'I' in 'team.'" I said, "Yeah, but there's an 'm' and an 'e.'"
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite type of basketball?
Dribble.
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
They eat the bat.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Cause they can't go to home base. 😈
There is this boy in my year; he is in a wheelchair, so I kicked a football at him and pushed him, and then I shouted, "Rocket League!"
On September 11th, 2001, the New York Giants lost against the Jets.
Why do orphans miss half their basketball season? Cause they don't have home games.
Why can't an orphan play basketball?
Because no one will be cheering them on.