Sports jokes
Why does Michael Jackson like to play ping pong or table tennis? He likes to play with the little balls.
Why are there no Olympics in Mexico? Because everyone from Mexico that can run, jump, and swim is already over the border.
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
What does a baby computer call his father? Data!
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!
Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”
I would tell jokes about Kobe, but they would just crash and burn.
Want to hear a joke?
Ohio State football.
Your hairline is so bad that it makes Lebron's hairline look normal.
Kobe never missed a shot, but he missed the helipad.
I'm going to hell!
Why can't Hitler join track?
Because he can't even finish a race.
Comment your favorite sport.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where the home is.
Also, what do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family photo.
I think they are New York Jets fans and the Jets QB helped them... That's why one of them was off target.
Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?
Because he successfully finished a race!
How to improve my beloved Penchester United in 5 easy steps:
1. Sell Casemeiro 🤑 2. Sell Pernandes 🤑 3. Sell Bencho 🤑 4. Sell Trashford 🤑 5. Terminate penaldo 🤑 6. Make Mctominay extend his deal 📝
These came down deep from my heart. Don’t let me down again, please.
What do an acting role and playing sports have in common?
If you break a leg, you get cast.
People told Kobe to fly high. Look what happened.
Why are orphans bad at baseball? Because they can't go home.
You know the sport that Mexicans are good at?
Cross-country.
What is better than winning gold at the Para Olympics?
WALKING!
What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain finished the races.