Sports jokes
Yo mama so fat, she broke Usain Bolt's 100 meter speed record by taking ONE STEP!
You know, it takes a lot of balls to successfully compete in women’s sports as a man.
A guard at a baseball stadium let in the pheasant, the chicken, and the duck. But he didn't let in the turkey. Why? Because four strikes and you are out!
What do you call a white man surrounded by black men? Coach.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
Why can't an orphan play baseball or softball?
They can't find home. 🤣
Lewandowski is so fast because whoever would think of adding an engine to him is a genius!
Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
Because everybody that can run, jump, and swim is already in the U.S.
Why can't Jesus play hockey?
He keeps getting nailed to the boards.
Q: What's the difference between LeBron James and a priest?
A: The size of balls they play with.
What did Hitler and Usain Bolt have in common?
They both finished the races.
Today someone was killed with a starter pistol. Police think it might be race related.
My willy was feeling itchy, so I decided to go to the doctor.
My doctor was foreign and spoke Spanish with an Argentinian accent. As I returned home, I noticed my willy was gone! Pessi stole my PENis thinking it was a Penalty just so he could statpad. SHAME ON YOU!
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is...
I was playing football with my friends, and I got tackled and got a penalty. Suddenly, the ground started shaking, and Penaldo emerged from the mud. He took the penalty, but since it wasn't Andorra, he missed. Shame on you, Penaldo!
Why did Little Sally get hurt while playing soccer?
Because she fell into a minefield.
If you take a shot, a paper wad, in the trashcan, and call "Kobe!" but miss, it's still a Kobe.
What did the football coach say when he went to the bank?
-"I want my quarterback."
Why can't Asians play Baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
What is a dry swimmer?
Not in the water...