Space

Space Jokes

Why was Boiling Water hired by NASA (The National Aeronautics and Space Administration) to oversee their Space division?

Because it has at least one hundred degrees.

A happy little girl was running on the grass, she saw two gay guys kissing in a blank space and she started crying, the two gay guys heard her crying and then they asked her: " why are you crying? ", the little girl answered: " this is the first time i see an unnatural nature " . ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

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That's not my age; it's just not true. My heart is young; the time just flew. I'm staring at this strange old face,and someone else is in my space.

I was in my first space mission for NASA. As we were orbiting the asteroid belt I saw a figure. I couldnโ€™t tell who it was but he spoke Spanish with an Argentinian accent. He said โ€œIโ€™m looking for my freekicks and penalties, can you help me find themโ€. We then decided to aid him

Ur mom is so fat that she has her own gravitational field. She attracts everything around her, from planets to asteroids to comets. She is the center of the solar system, and the sun is just one of her many satellites. She is so massive that she bends space and time, creating wormholes and black holes. She is the ultimate cosmic phenomenon, and no one can escape her pull.

Ur mom is so old that she witnessed the Big Bang. She was there when the universe was born, and she has seen it all. She knows the secrets of the cosmos, and she has lived through every epoch and era. She has watched stars form and die, galaxies collide and merge, and civilizations rise and fall. She is the oldest living being in existence, and she has more wisdom than anyone can imagine.

Ur mom is so ugly that she scares away aliens. She is the reason why we have never made contact with extraterrestrial life. They have seen her face and they have fled in terror. They have warned their fellow species to avoid Earth at all costs, because it is inhabited by a monstrous creature that defies all logic and beauty. She is the ultimate deterrent for invasion, and she has saved humanity from countless alien invasions.

Blonde starts new job at local car dealership when a wealthy gentleman comes in looking for a spacious car for his large family. The blonde is excited as she gets commission so eagerly shows him the most expensive SUVs.... The gentleman has a good look round before saying to the blonde 'it looks perfect....But Cargo space?' To which she instantly replied 'Oh I'm Sorry sir, Car only for road.

Why canโ€™t orphans be a space ship because they donโ€™t have a mothership๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿคช.

What is a nut ๐Ÿฅœ that is in outer space ๐Ÿช? A broken nut ๐Ÿฅœ

Dolly Parton and Queen Elizabeth went to the Pearly Gates on the same day.

They both met with an Angel to find out if they would be admitted to Heaven.

The angel said "Unfortunately, there's only one space in Heaven today so I must decide which one of you will be admitted."

The Angel asked Dolly if there was some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.

Dolly took off her top and said, "Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity."

The Angel thanked Dolly, and asked Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth the same question.

The Queen walked over to a toilet, pulled the lever and flushes it without saying a word.

The Angel immediately said, "OK, your Majesty, you may go into Heaven."

Dolly was outraged and asked, "What was that all about? I showed you two of God's own perfect creations and you turned me down. She simply flushed a commode and she got admitted to Heaven! Would you explain that to me?

"Sorry, Dolly," said the Angel, "but even in Heaven, a royal flush beats a pair - no matter how big they are."