Space jokes
Is Uranus big? Well... your anus is...
I invented a time-traveling machine and traveled back to Pangea. I warned the dinosaurs about the deadly asteroid. They told me, "It wasn't an asteroid... it was Pionel Pessi's penalty ball ricocheted from Mars that made them extinct." Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Pessi!
Why has nobody been on Neptune? Because the wind is so big. And why the wind's so big? Because Neptune's yelling, "GETT OFFF MMY PPRROOPERRTY!!"
Uranus is larger than Neptune, but Neptune is more massive/heavier. (Fact not joke, also Neptune, don't kill me!)
For being a big company, NASA is openly saying they want pictures of Uranus.
What does NASA say when they don’t want to go in space: Never Access Space Again.
Q: What do you call a chip that goes fast?
A: A rocket chip.
*trigger alert*
Why did the racist cop shut down the space brothel?
Because there were too many black holes.
Yo forehead so big, NASA needed it for the new planet, stupid!
What did Mars say to Saturn?
"Give me one of your rings!" 😄
How do you throw a space party?
You plan-et! Hahahaha, get it?
Why haven’t any women gone to the moon?
A: It doesn’t need to be cleaned.
Yo mama so fat that when she was on the moon, she had it sent right into the abyss of outer space.
What's an astronaut's favorite candy? A Milky Way!
A science teacher got on the Space Shuttle Challenger after winning a contest out of 11,000 other teachers.
Imagine being one of the losing teachers in that contest, watching the Space Shuttle Challenger, and thinking, "Talking about dodging a bullet!"
Why is Mars red? Because it saw Uranus! 😂
Yo mama so fat, she plays tennis with Pluto.
Teacher: What’s the closest planet?
Kids yell: Sun.
Except for one.
Other kid: Uranus.
Teacher: Uranus?
Other kid: Yeah, it’s right there.
My friend, what's up?
Me: What's up in space is planets and stars.
What does NASA stand for? Nobody Asked, Someone Answered.