So I asked a Chinese woman for her number, she said "sex, sex, sex, free sex tonight ." Her friend said "No, it's 666-3629."
So Johnny was working at a deli, a woman walks up and asks, do you have any salad? Johnny says no, she asks? What about carrots? Again Johnny says no, she says what about bananas? Johnny says "tell ya what, spell out "lad" in salad" she spells L A D, Johnny replies "spell "rot" in carrot" she spells R O T, Johnny says "now spell "fuck" in vegetables or fruits" she says "there is no fuck in vegetables or fruits" Johnny exclaims "thats what ive been trying to tell you!"
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side so i crashed the car.
Billy: I'm so use to having you in bed with me, I don't know if I'm ready for this long distance relationship
Sally: Ohh, don't worry brother, I'll just be right down the hall...
If a fly loses its wings is it now a walk wait a minute I found out a mind blower so the 🌎 is the 3rd planet from the sun doesn't that mean all country's are the called the 3rd country of 🌎 if I get 10 likes I'll do one mind blowing facts daily
Why is it so easy bullying orphans They can’t tell their mom
Why are Americans so bad at clash Royale
Because they’ve already lost 2 towers
Your mom's so fat that One Punch Man had to take two punches.
When the speedbump in a school zone screams so you go faster
So this guy is talking to his buddy about his flying lessons. My first time in the air, my instructor informed me but he was an 8th degree black belt and homosexual, and if I don't succumb to his sexual advances I would have to jump out of the plane, and his buddy says "well did you jump?"the guy says yeah, a little at first.
You’re so ugly the whole world faked a virus just so u could wear a mask
Yo mama, so ugly she's the reason why Batman fights crime at night.
The Pentagon is changing the nuclear codes to over 140 characters, ...
so Trump can't tweet it.
I was beefin wit a dude and a wheel chair so I took his wheel chair and threw it across the street and told him walk it off u will be fine
I get so many thing stuck in my head, though, unfortunately none of them were a bullet.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she went trick or treating on Halloween 2016, the clowns thought she was their supreme leader.
Pickup lines in 2022 are like: "Are you Russia? Because your bombs are so big!"
Why are orphans so bad at poker? they don’t know what a full house is!
So my dad said to me and my sister don't fight but did he mean "fist fight" or "yelling fight?"
Yo Mama is so fat, that when i unfollowed her on instagram, my phone got 1 GB of storage
