Someone jokes
Why does an orphan like church so much? So he can call someone "father."
If you unironically think someone who killed themselves should have their body in jail, you are honestly such a fucking embarrassment to humanity.
How do you know someone is autistic?
They get stuck in a loop very often.
What do you call someone who is extra virgin?
Mrs. Frame.
6 looks like someone facing up.
9 looks like someone facing down.
69 looks like 2 people sucking each other's dicks.
I took 7 coins from someone. He even came back from the dead to get them.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
How do men like their women? Striped.
How does a priest like their children? Clean.
Why are most orphans strippers? They want to call someone mommy or daddy.
What is the difference between a stripper and candy? None. But they like it when you take the wrapper off.
Tip for Kindness for the day.
Tip one. Always speak up for yourself.
Yes, letting someone else speak up for you is nice but also speak up for yourself, be brave if a mean bully comes along. Speak up for yourself and others if they need it. Best, Gwen
What's the difference between a cop and a bullet?
When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.
1. Your face is so ugly, I thought it was deformed. It probably was anyways.
2. Even if Donald Trump had time to build a wall, it was probably so you won't squish us with your fatass.
If someone says your face is deformed, just say that's what happens when I look at you.
Welcome.
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says, "Sorry, it was an axe-cident!"
Why do orphans go to church?
Because they can call someone "father."
I prank called someone saying, "SON! IT'S ME, SON! I'M COMING FOR YOU!!!" My friend next to me asked who I was calling, and I said, "the orphanage."
What did Michael Scott say to someone when he passed a plate of vegetables?
Boom! Roasted!
If you kill someone, that's murder.
If you kill a family member, that's still murder.
If you kill a child, that's "child abuse."
The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing someone's cast.
Why do orphans love to go to church? Because they have someone to call father.
Someone: Stop making jokes about sh!
Me: Oh, sorry man, I'll cut it out, I'll cut it out deep!
Every time someone calls me fat, I get so depressed I cut myself... a piece of cake.