Society jokes
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his ass.
An autistic woman walks into a bar. "A serving of Screaming Banshee, please," she says.
The bartender says, "Ok, you seem to like it, unlike a retired special ed teacher that passed through a few minutes ago."
If an orphan were to get a takeaway, what’s the home address?
Which restaurants can an orphan not go to?
A family restaurant.
Why can’t orphans order from Costa?
They need a parent or guardian with them.
What do orphans do when they get a phone? They press the home button.
Why does an orphan not play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
What does an orphan call a family photo?
A selfie.
What is the difference between an orphan and a homeless person? Nothing, haha.
A rapist, pedophile, and a priest walk into a bar.
He orders a beer.
Why can’t orphans have phones?
Because it has a home button.
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t get a home run.
What do you call a bunch of Black people in the river?
A black current...
An Aboriginal Australian told me that I was on his farmland.
So I told him he was on my cock.
(I'm Australian btw, respect to my American bros🇺🇸)
As an American, I like cars. And like all car enthusiasts, even just a little scratch can ruin a brand new car.
So why is it that we go to different countries like India and see that almost every car is completely totaled? I guess we have different meanings of "it's just a scratch."
Gregg says to his friend, who is a girl, and says, "Hey, umm, do you, umm, want to do something?"
And the girl says, "Umm, sure, why not?"
Gregg says, "Well, then we have to go somewhere secretive."
The girl says, "Umm, well, ok."
Gregg says, "Great!" So Gregg brings Sally to a tree so no one can see them, and then Sally says, "So what are we going to do behind this big tree?"
Gregg says, "Well pull down your pants, and I'll show ya."
Sally says, "Ok, it sounds fun!" And then Gregg pulls his pants down and tells Sally to lay on the ground. Then he puts his dick in Sally's pussy, and he goes up and down, up and down, up and down, and then Sally starts to moan more and more, and then suddenly a teacher hears her moan, and then the teacher sees what Gregg and Sally are doing, and then the teacher gets in on it, and both Gregg and Sally start fucking the teacher, and then the teacher moans, and then the whole school makes their own sex groups, and the whole school has threesomes...
THE END
You are all fucking disgusting!
The sad thing is when they ride the scooters in Wal-Mart... Really, you declining to walk is what got your fat ass in that scooter to begin with... And damned if they aren't buying diet soda... Please... cull this shit... We don't need them in society... KFC is not a disease.
Christopher Columbus: *Sees native Americans* Can I see your land?
Native Americans: Sure, just be care..........
Christopher Columbus: Boonk gang whole lot of gang shit.
What do you call an orphan with parents?
Idk, I never met one before.
Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."
Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.
More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?
An orphan.
Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?
Because they can’t find one.
lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!
How do you know when you are dating a cannibal?
You go to the beach, he offers to put suntan oil on you, and the brand name is Wesson.
You are having sex and he says he wants to eat your a$$ and you notice he is holding a knife and fork.
He invites you to his home to use the hot tub and it is heated by a wood fire.
You are having an argument and you say "bite me" and he starts to sharpen his teeth.