I don't understand why people get offended by incest jokes; they're so family friendly.
What is the real reason why men jack off? They just enjoy killing kids.
What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Yo mum." "Yo mum who?" "Yo mum is watching you wank right now."
What's the best thing about a dead hooker? Refunds.
I would curse at you, but my country praises cows.
Why do sisters hate you?
Because you're their favorite stepbrother :P
What do cannibals call pregnant women? A kinder surprise.
A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, "Dad, how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big dick?"
Her father replied, "Honey, you should have watched me last night. It was inside my mouth. Does it cycle now?"
What do tampons and your sister have in common?
Me: "I like kids."
When I become a parent, I’m gonna regurgitate my food to feed my children.
It’ll give me an excuse to make out with my daughter.