Situation jokes

Q. Why do orphans love elevators?

A. Because they're the only things to raise them.

You know, their family dinners must be so happy.

When the grass is bloody, You play in the mud...

So I was at the store and I saw a pretty woman, and I said, "Hi."

Quickly, she said, "I am not interested. I have a husband."

And when I saw the woman again, she said, "I need help."

I said, "No, call your husband!" KARMA. 😂😜

Girl, come here, my parents aren't home.

Orphan: Mine are never.

If someone says nobody asked, you could say, "Well, nobody asked for you to talk!"

Do you know why pedos get away with molesting orphans? Who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.

Who is Joe?

You reply back: Who is Candice?

They reply back: Who is Candice?

You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."

A girl came to my house. She said, "Where are your parents?" I started crying.

How do you fit 3 gay guys on a barstool? Flip it upside down.

That moment when you think the music is loud enough to fart and no one would notice, but then you realize that you have headphones on.

What kind of videos can't orphans watch?

Family-friendly content.

I came on for an orphan joke.

Then I realized they are a joke.

The difference between dark jokes and morbid is,

dark jokes are 10 babies in 1 trash can, and

morbid jokes are 1 baby in 10 trash cans.

What is an orphan's favorite movie? Home Alone.

What’s the difference between you and an orphan...

NOTHING!

My dad is unlucky.

A blond and her brunette friend were chatting about their boyfriends; the brunette goes on and on about how dirty her boyfriend is with her.

To not be outdone, the blond retorts:

"That's nothing! Once we were in the kitchen, I can't believe I didn't see it coming. One minute I turned, and he just got it all on my face! It was so thick and hard! It covered my mouth, my nose, my shoulders, and eyes. It even got in my hair, and when I looked up at him, all he could say was, 'Whoops! The flower went everywhere!'"

Knock knock.

Who's there?

You.

You who?

Don't you get it? You're the joke, dumbass!

The pastor jumped at the chance to meet Ariana the other day.

He also grabbed, fondled, and fingered. Some might say he was milking the situation.