Situation jokes

What do you call an orphan when he's taking a photo?

Family photo.

What did the orphan say when his mum asked, "What do you want for dinner?"

He replied, " "

What does the f in orphan stand for? Family.

You know, their family dinners must be so happy.

Same old boring ass day, until a person with Parkinson's fainted and got everyone's attention.

He really shook things up today.

Beans and toast.

The Past, Present & Future walked into a bar.

It was tense!

One day I went skating and skated for so long that my feet were incredibly sore.

It was like my skates were moving all by themselves, but I decided to just roll with the situation.

What is going on here?

What time is it when you say "bad day?"

A guy is walking down the street when he almost steps in something. He looks down and says, "Looks like shit."

He crouches down and smells it, "Smells like shit."

He sticks his finger in, tastes it, "Tastes like shit."

He then smiles and says, "Well, good thing I didn't step on it!"

So I went to a mall and I was finna buy something... and I saw a little boy and he said "hello," so then I passed by him and he said "hi," and I was like "hi nigga," and he said, "um, just wondering something... I mean I like jokes, but what is dark humor?" And I was like "umm🤔.. it's like 🤔🤔...like you see that guy without legs? Tell him to stand up"... and he said "I'm blind nigga" and I said "exactly homie"... aight nigga peace and look out😏😉

Two muffins are sitting in a bar.

The first muffin says to the bartender, "I'll have the usual."

The second one does not say anything to the bartender because muffins lack the vocal ability of humans, and even with the proper anatomy capable of speech access, they would most certainly be entirely unable to comprehend the human language. In fact, the first muffin would indefinitely not be able to provide speech to the bartender. The muffins also lack the muscular structure to be capable of support themselves to being suspended also preventing their access to movement. Even with the human-like structure, muffins lack brains, which are an essential part of being able to send nerve contact within the legs to be able to move. Also, with them lacking a brain structure entirely prevents them from speech. The anatomy simply prohibits the food items mentioned to be able to carry out any of the tasks required to get them to said bar and be able to speak, thus making the situation untruthful and completely idiotic.

Why don't orphans like pizza? Because they don't have parents, that's why.

An orphan walks into a bar and the barman says, "What are you doing here? You need parent's permission!"

"Oh no, who will I ask?" the orphan says.

Duck!!

Where??

This one time I said to a person that they are dry, then I was wet (ba dum tiss).

My bully said I have to shut up. I said, "Shut down" (ba dum tiss).

Do you want to hear a dark joke? Let me turn the lights off.

You wanna hear an orphan joke?

Okay, here it goes:

You.

Your life is the joke.