Sister

Sister jokes

Homework

  • Lenda: Hey, can you help me with my homework, please?!

    Genda: Okay, and if I do, you won't make a fuss about it!

    Lenda: I'll try!

    3 mins later.

    Genda: THAT IS NOT THE RIGHT ANSWER!

    Lenda: Then what is 90 million?

    Genda: WHA WHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Lenda mocking her: WHA OH YEAH YOU ARE A TERRIBLE TUTOR!!!!!!!!

    4 mins later.

    Genda: What is the capitol of watchington?

    Lenda: Uh.....Idaho!

    Genda being sarcastic: Yes...it is not the capitol of watchington...BECAUSE IT IS A STATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Lenda: Oh, you mean Iowa!

    Genda: UHHHHHHHHHHHH CUSS WORD!!!!!!!!!!

    Lenda: U can't help that I'm the smart one...okay sweetie now you go be dumb and I go be smart! LATER SISTER! Oh wait, can you help me with my homework?

    Genda: NO! You the smart one so you do it!

    Fat

  • Your so fat, my sister said. I said, "So at least I ain't fatter than your momma."

    Pizza

  • My sister said, "LET'S GO TO PIZZA!" So, I went to the pizza shop with her and she replied, "We really only needed the car?"

    Draft

  • To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him.

    “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.”

    “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls,” replies the nun. “I didn't want to get drafted either.”

  • 2
  • Prank

  • Hi guys, the prankster is back!

    I was gone for a long time because of this bullying about a nice sweet girl named Gwen! So my 6th prank is on...

    When I put some bad stuff in my sister's toothpaste bottle!

    Okay, so I took some smelly mints from the jelly bean game! I had molded cheese jelly bean, molded milk, and worms jelly bean! Jelly bean tasting is this game where weird tasted jelly beans are in there, so I got some mints and put it there! Then next thing you knew was, my sassy ass sister had her breath smelling like a chimpanzee's buttock!

    Sleepover

  • Two girls have a sleepover.

    Karen: Let's go to bed.

    Lauren: Fine, but it's early.

    *Karen wakes up and exits room*

    *Lauren hears noise*

    Mikey: You're so much better than my girlfriend, Karen.

    Lauren: *laughs*

    Lauren: *remembers her boyfriend is Karen's brother, Mikey*

  • 2
  • Nun

  • Two nuns walk into a liquor store, and one asked the clerk for the biggest bottle of Irish whisky he had.

    The clerk replied, "Heck no sister, you nuns aren't supposed to drink that stuff!" The nun said, "Well my son, it is not for us, you see, it is for Mother Teresa," then the nun whispers, "She has the constipation."

    The clerk said, "Oh, in that case, it's on the house. Here's the biggest jug we have." The nuns thank him, bless him, and leave. A few hours later, as the clerk is leaving, he sees the same two sisters in the parking lot, rolling around and drinking the Irish whiskey. Appalled, he goes over to them and says, "You ladies lied to me! You told me it was for Mother Teresa for her constipation!"

    One of the nuns takes another swig, looks up at him and says "You wanna know something buddy? She sure will shit when she sees us!"

  • 1
  • Trash

  • My sis came up to me and said, "Mom told me to take the trash out for the rest of the year."

    "So, uh, you free tomorrow?" 😂

    Dad

  • Daughter: Dad, why did Mom do best?

    Dad: Nothing, except pretend to love us and leave.

    Daughter: So she only loves my sister?

    Dad: Yep.

    Kid

  • Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin."

    Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night."

    Kid 1: "As if."

    Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister."

    Kid 1: "I don't have a sister."

    Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."

  • 5
  • Trophy

  • I saw a trophy in my sister's room. So I said congratulations on your cheer leading. My sister said I didn't win the trophy for cheer leading, so I asked why. My sister said I won because I give the best jobs.

  • 1
  • Fight

  • You and your sister always get into a fight and she says, "I don't care." Then you say right away, "About you!"