Single Jokes

The FitnessGramTM Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

Level 1 Feel it One Two Three Four Five Six Seven; end of level one

What's the single worst terrestrial species? HUMANS OBVIOUSLY.

For orphans .. every bag of chips is familly sized

Global warming will kill every single person on this planet, It's a good thing I'm married...

A bus full of Nuns falls of a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter. St. Peter says to them “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all though the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question. ”

St. Peter turns to the first Nun in the line and asks her “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister Responds “Well... there was this one time... that I kinda sorta... touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...” St. Peter says “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.

St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well.... There was this one time... that I held one for a moment...” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.

Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”

Who needs singles day when your single for the rest of your life!

Jack quietly crawled through Jill’s bedroom window, trying not to make a single noise. She sat on her bed, her back facing him. Jack tiptoed up behind her, laid his hands on her shoulders and said, in a rather sensual tone,

“Boo.”

“Jack!” She yelled, “what are you doing here?”

Jack sat down next to her and smiled.

“I figured today was a good day to maybe go up to the hill?” He said.

“That sounds fun,” said Jill.

“C’mon, let’s go!”

The kids climbed down from Jill’s second story window. The frolicked around in the fields, hair swaying in the wind, as they neared the nearby hill. Jack took Jill’s hand, and they skipped up to the very top of the hill. They sat down on the bright green grass and giggled.

“You ready?” Asked Jack

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Jill replied with a wink.

Jack laid his hand on Jill’s chest, softly pushing her onto her back. He got down on his knees, and bent down to the bottom of her dress.

“I’ve waited a long time for this...” he whispered.

Jack slowly pulled up Jill’s dress with one hand, running the other up her thigh. His anticipation was building faster and faster. He looked her in the eyes as he slowly pulled down her panties. Once they were all the way off, he turned his head downward. His mouth opened, his eyes went wide. Jack was speechless. Before he could say anything, Jill slammed his head down, gagging him with her giant cock. She sat up as she slammed his head up and down. Jack began to feel dizzy as he gagged and coughed.

“Silly Jack, didn’t you know? I’m not Jill. I never was. My name’s Randy. You’re mine now, Jack. So sit back, enjoy the ride.” Said Randy.

Randy moved Jack’s head faster and faster as he threw his head back. It was coming, fast. All of a sudden, he stopped. Jack’s head stood still as his mouth became a fountain of white, drizzling all over Randy’s legs and onto the grass. Randy let go and Jack jumped back, spitting and trying to get it all out of his mouth. Just as the dizziness began to fade, Randy walked over. The last thing Jack saw was Randy’s fist hurtling towards him...

today, i asked my phone, "siri why am i still single" and it activated the front camera

You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!

everyone: so wait let me get this straight feminist want to cancel fathers day because it is offensive to single mothers

feminist: correct

everyone: THEN WTF IS THE POINT OF MOTHERS DAY

Girl: hi(flirt) Boy: hi?(reluctant) Girl: im a cheerleader captain, im also single.(flirt) Boy 2: exuse me?! He's MY MAN...

I don't understand those couples that fight and a minute later change their Facebook status to single I fight with my parents but you don't see me change my status to Orphan

i hate it when couples get into a little fight and the change their Facebook status to "single". i have fights with my parents but I don't change my Facebook status to "orphan".

my freind told me that he saw a yacht went close in to the yetis eye so i said to my freind did the yeti kiss but my freind said no the yeti have to play games every single day or the yeti will die.

Hi I'm Claire, I am new to this website. I have been seeing these "Legends" and I've been tracking one specifically, watersharky. I have questions about him. Is he nice?, Protective?, Single? If anyone has anymore information about him please tell me.

Like this if you are a single Pringle like me

Where do you buy a dishwasher. Hot singles in your area

there's a plane crash every single person died who lived? the married people!

You see a boat filled with people, yet there isn’t a single person on board. How is that possible? All of them are married!

I stood in front of the mirror. "Joseph, I will love and protect you forever" my dick cooed. I looked down at it a single crystalline tear sliding down my face. I was at peace