Short jokes

What do old people and meth heads have in common? They usually trip over their balls.

Where does the orphan go when he's done with school? To the cemetery.

What did the orphan say to his parents?

I'm tripping balls right now!

I kicked a ball into someone. Now I got a red card.

How does the next train stop for a depressive person? Death.

Why do priests play Geometry Dash? Cuz they can beat Demons.

I wanted to make a joke about homework, but sadly, I'm an orphan.

How do you make it hard for a rapist who is trying to rape you? Rub it.

You can say he is not your type until you realize your type is not typing.

It's not Minecraft.

It's Ourcraft!

Please welcome Mozart's The Magic Flute...

In A minor.

Why was the snowman looking through a bag of carrots?

He was picking his nose.

Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing!

I'm 24 and I was with a Chinese lady, and she kept screaming, "I'm too young!" Like, I don't know what that name is.

What do you call an artist who couldn't make it as Hitler?

I just wrote a book on reverse psychology. Do not read it.

I remember waving at this guy in the street. The a**hole didn't wave back... Come to think of it, he was also swinging around a weird stick.

Is your hairline a time traveler, because it went way back?

When someone saw your hairline, they thought it was a Dorito logo.

A blind man handed me a piece of paper. It said, "⠊⠋ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠉⠁⠝ ⠞⠗⠁⠝⠎⠇⠁⠞⠑ ⠞⠓⠊⠎ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠁⠗⠑ ⠛⠁⠽."

I have no idea how he knew.