Short jokes
Doctor: Do you want the good news or the bad news first?
Patient: Good news!
Doctor: We are naming a disease after you.
Why do dwarfs work at Tesco?
Because every little helps!
I looked up "I have whiplash" on WebMD, and it diagnosed me with slavery.
Why do pedos hate corona? Because they have to stay two meters away from children. 😈
When his dick is really, really small, but you pretend it is so big it hurts so you don’t make him feel bad 'cause he is a nice guy.
Q. What’s white, sticky, and better to spit than to swallow?
A. Toothpaste.
What did the dick say to the condom?
Cover me, I'm going in. 😚😏
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
"If we don’t get some support people will think we are ball sacks..."
During this COVID shit, if a guy starts following you with the masks on, should you be scared, or is that dumb bastard just your boyfriend?
For boys, life is a lot like a penis: simple, soft, straight, relaxed, and hanging freely......... then a woman makes it really hard.😩😉😏
Q. What makes music on your hair?
A. A headband!
Q. What's the most musical bone?
A. The trom-bone!
Don't make fun of fat people. They already have a lot on their plate.
My last 15 minutes as a 23 y/o!!
It's not my birthday, but a scary-looking man with a crowbar just broke into my house.
Q. What's long, hard, and scary when you first see it?
A. Calculus homework.
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
Women: Can I have your number?
Jesus: No.
Women: Why? Are you scared?
Jesus: No. Just when you wanna talk, just pray.
Girl: Rip, mother, I love you.
Me: Sorry for your loss.
Girl: Stop, I have a boyfriend.
Me: Stop, I have a mother.
This girl called me cute, and I told her don’t call me that. She says why, I told her, “Bitch, call me the Hokage!”
Why do Americans always win at the shooting Olympics?
Because they train at the best school.