Shock humor jokes

The teacher asks her class, "What is sex?" and Little Jonny stands up and says, "Sex is the temptation caused by the sensation when a boy sticks his location into a girl's destination. Did you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?" and the teacher fainted.

A black dude shows up to a job interview for a watermelon farmhand gig, resume full of fried chicken joint experience. The boss asks, "Why should I hire you?" He stutters, "Uh, I got skills in... uh..." Before he can finish, a hulk-like, veiny, muscular, giant transgender man storms in, straps him to the interview desk with velvet cuffs, drips hot wax on his back from a candle shaped like a massive dick, and rams his ass relentlessly while whispering, "Welcome to the team, bitch. Your probation starts now."

What attracted Jeffrey Dahmer to abortion clinics?

- He smelled veal.

Roses are tree.

I shoved a battery up my butt.

Loona from Helluva Boss is a retarded mutt.

Three citizens were going through an exam to become agents of the FBI. Their instructor handed the first guy a gun in a room with his wife and said he had to shoot her. He walked out in shame and said he couldn't do it. The second guy had the same scenario. He put the gun up, but couldn't pull the trigger, so he walked out in shame. The third guy was put in the same scenario. He walked out and told the instructor, "The gun wasn't loaded, I had to strangle the bitch."

Necrophilia in Alabama is fun for the whole family, even grandma.

What's the hardest part of running through a field of dead babies?

My boner.

Warning, this is dark.

How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch? Give 'em a Sandy Hook.

How long does it take for 5 babies to die in the microwave?

I don't know, I can't count while I masturbate...